03-05-2003, 09:24 PM
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#1 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Amherst, MA and Franklin, MA
Posts: 2,443
| Best Monty Python line
As I have noticed there are a lot of Monty Python fans. Now, in your opinion which is the best line, or part of the movie.
Mine:
Arthur: "The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water signifying by Divine Providence that I, Arthur, was to carry Excalibur. That is why I am your king!"
Dennis: "Listen -- strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony."
Arthur: "Be quiet!"
Dennis: "Well you can't expect to wield supreme executive power just 'cause some watery tart threw a sword at you!"
Arthur: "Shut up!"
Dennis:"I mean, if I went around sayin' I was an empereror just because some moistened bink had lobbed a scimitar at me they'd put me away!"
Then I guess the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch, someone else can have that as their vote though.
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03-06-2003, 01:52 AM
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#2 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: West Coast
Posts: 2,367
| "She turned me into a newt!"
Everyone turns to stare at the villager.
"Oi got better!"
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"Fraud is the creation of trust. And then: its betrayal."
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03-06-2003, 02:01 AM
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#3 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 1999 Location: Australia - various
Posts: 2,756
| Has to be
"Alms for an ex leper?" I cant remember the rest.
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You may love me but you dont accept me. I dont want your love without your acceptance. | |
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03-06-2003, 02:06 AM
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#4 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: New England/DC
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| Pining for the fjords | |
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03-06-2003, 08:29 AM
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#5 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Kent, England
Posts: 232
| From the Life of Brian:
Brian: You're all individuals!
Crowd: Yes, we're all indivuals!
Lone man: I'm not.
Or perhaps...
Brian's Mum: He's not the messiah, he's a very naughty boy!
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03-06-2003, 08:33 AM
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#6 | | Just Joined
Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: England
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| Mrs Pepperpot: I strongly object to all this sex on the television, I mean, I keep falling off!
Thats gotta be one of the best, surely.
Joule
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03-06-2003, 10:37 AM
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#7 | | Just Joined
Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Currently - worcester, MA
Posts: 27
| I think for the sheer absurdity of it, that almost reaches some exhalted existential level, I'd have to go with:
My hovercraft is full of eels.
chris | |
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03-06-2003, 11:29 AM
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#8 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: West Coast
Posts: 2,367
| From the "Government Bureau of Arguments" skit:
Citizen: "Look, simply refuting everything I say is not an argument!!!"
Bureaucrat: "Yes it is."
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"Fraud is the creation of trust. And then: its betrayal."
William Black, Ph.D.
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03-06-2003, 12:21 PM
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#9 | | Admin
Join Date: Dec 1999 Location: Atlanta, GA
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| The Flying Sheep sketch:
"They don't fly so much as plummet." | |
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03-06-2003, 12:30 PM
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#10 | | Senior Member
Join Date: May 2001
Posts: 698
| The funniest joke in the world.
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It is the soldier, not the reporter, who has given us the freedom of the press. It is the soldier, not the poet, who has given us the freedom of speech. It is the soldier, not the campus organizer, who gives us the freedom to demonstrate. It is the soldier who salutes the flag, who serves beneath the flag, and whose coffin is draped by the flag, who allows the protestor to burn the flag. - Father Dennis Edward O'Brien, USMC
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03-06-2003, 12:58 PM
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#11 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Mid Atlantic
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| Mr Creosote:
" Better get me a bucket, I think I'm gonna puke" | |
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03-06-2003, 01:45 PM
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#12 | | Just Joined
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| "I didn't expect a sort of Spanish Inquisition..."
(Musical sting as three cardinals burst into the room)
"NO ONE EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION!" | |
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03-06-2003, 01:57 PM
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#13 | | Senior Member
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| "Dennis Moore...Dennis Moore...is not in this bit." | |
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03-06-2003, 05:17 PM
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03-06-2003, 08:53 PM
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#15 | | Member
Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Raleigh, NC
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| "Cardinal Biggles, get THE RACK!" <jarring chord>
Last edited by Toecutter; 07-30-2007 at 05:38 PM.
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03-06-2003, 09:01 PM
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#16 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: NYC
Posts: 133
| Rats!
Quote: Originally posted by Aoife
From the Life of Brian:
Brian: You're all individuals!
Crowd: Yes, we're all indivuals!
Lone man: I'm not.
| Hey -- you beat me to it!
A close second?
"...I wish I was a girlie,
just like my dear papa!"
Why do I like the Lumberjack Song? Not so sure -- maybe Tom Lehrer said it best:
"I find that if you take the various popular song forms to their logical extremes, you can arrive at almost anything from the ridiculous to the obscene, or -- as they say in New York -- sophisticated."
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The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser people so full of doubts. -- B. Russel
Injustice is relatively easy to bear; what stings, however, is justice. -- H. L. Mencken
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03-06-2003, 09:41 PM
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#17 | | Curmudgeon-in-Chief
Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Somewhere in your nightmares!
Posts: 23,203
| From "Holy Grail", I am partial to the "Bring out yer dead!" bit. For single best line I nominate the reply to "How d'ye know he's a king?"---"Hasn't got s*** all over 'im". Although "Huuuge...tracts of land" and "Please, let me have just a LITTLE peril!" also crack me up, probably it's a male thing, heh heh...
In the whole Python canon, it's SO hard to choose. In addition to those already entioned by others I like the fish license sketch, also the group of men vying for the best "when I was growing up" hardship tale.
Last edited by Inquartata; 03-06-2003 at 09:44 PM.
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03-06-2003, 11:04 PM
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#18 | | Quit (no longer with us)
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 40
| The lumberjack Songs
I used to watch them when I babysat the kids next door. It was between this one and the parrot routines:
---------------------------------------------
I never wanted to do this job in the first place!
I... I wanted to be...
A LUMBERJACK!
(piano vamp)
Leaping from tree to tree! As they float down the mighty rivers of
British Columbia! With my best girl by my side!
The Larch!
The Pine!
The Giant Redwood tree!
The Sequoia!
The Little Whopping Rule Tree!
We'd sing! Sing! Sing!
Oh, I'm a lumberjack, and I'm okay,
I sleep all night and I work all day.
CHORUS: He's a lumberjack, and he's okay,
He sleeps all night and he works all day.
I cut down trees, I eat my lunch,
I go to the lava-try.
On Wednesdays I go shoppin'
And have buttered scones for tea.
Mounties: He cuts down trees, he eats his lunch,
He goes to the lava-try.
On Wednesdays 'e goes shoppin'
And has buttered scones for tea.
CHORUS
I cut down trees, I skip and jump,
I like to press wild flowers.
I put on women's clothing,
And hang around in bars.
Mounties: He cuts down trees, he skips and jumps,
He likes to press wild flowers.
He puts on women's clothing
And hangs around.... In bars???????
CHORUS
I chop down trees, I wear high heels,
Suspendies and a bra.
I wish I'd been a girlie
Just like my dear papa.
Mounties: He cuts down trees, he wears high heels
Suspendies?? and a .... a Bra????
(spoken, raggedly) What's this? Wants to be a *girlie*? Oh, My!
And I thought you were so rugged!
CHORUS
All: He's a lumberjack, and he's okaaaaaaayyy..... (BONG)
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03-06-2003, 11:09 PM
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#19 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: NYC
Posts: 133
| I bet those kids turned out just ... fine. 
__________________
The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser people so full of doubts. -- B. Russel
Injustice is relatively easy to bear; what stings, however, is justice. -- H. L. Mencken
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03-06-2003, 11:13 PM
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#20 | | Quit (no longer with us)
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 40
| the kids
i think so, i was a pretty good influence, they got to watch pythons flying circus, the avengers - [da, da da daaaa daaaaa}- they were cute, the 5 year old ran around with a batman cape on all evening, he loved batman, he got to watch batman too. it was fun.
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