| Welcome.
I have to say it's a quite a coincidence because I did a very similar thing four years ago at the age of 41. On top of that, at the time, I was 6'0" and about 270 (jacket range 50-52L and 44" waist). I ran into the same problems as you: generally, fencing gear is made for slim, fit folk.
The best source I found for "big" gear off the rack has been Triplette. They make a wide range of sizes in jackets, pants and lamés. Their stuff is well made although, in the lower price ranges especially, a bit heavy.
I got my first jacket and my only lamé from them. I made the mistake of getting a back zip (I'm ambidextrous and wasn't sure of which hand to fence with). When I finally committed, I got a front zip jacket from Physical Chess. I then moved on to a synthetic jacket from American Fencer's Supply and finally settled on an FIE set from Soudet of France which I had custom made.
The moral of this story is that you can easily get the size you need from Triplette, and any of the larger manufacturers (Uhlmann, Allstar, Negrini and Triplette, too) will custom make gear for you for an additional fee (typically 10%, although Soudet didn't charge anything extra).
The key is to take honest measurements (not clothing sizes as these vary significantly) and give them to your vendor when trying to size or order gear.
Paolo
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"He is a man of splendid abilities but utterly corrupt. He shines and stinks like rotten mackerel by moonlight." "Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin to slit throats."
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