Fencing Zombie Survival Guide

[Craig]

Includes tips to tell referees from zombies.

Please share your own.

Zombie Survival Guide for Fencers

[larkascending]

There's a zombie saber event in an upcoming tournament... It's just like normal saber, except only the head is target, because you have to get them in the brain.

I kind of wish I could go and fence it.

Shotguns are, of course, the gold standard for zombie defense.

[ladyofshalott99]

General rule of thumb: try to blend in, so they're not as likely to eat your brainssss....

I know some fencers who both dress for the Zombie Walk, AND got married recently. They had a zombie-themed wedding cake. It was quite tasty, except for the lack of brains.

[larkascending]

Has anybody here read the book Pride and Prejudice and Zombies?

[InFerrumVeritas]

Footwork is key.

[foibles]

Footwork is key.

Got that right.

"Caint reach-cha, caint eat-cha"

[noodle]

There's a zombie saber event in an upcoming tournament... It's just like normal saber, except only the head is target, because you have to get them in the brain.

I kind of wish I could go and fence it.

Shotguns are, of course, the gold standard for zombie defense.

i have to admit, that this is awesome

[irishfolker]

Has anybody here read the book Pride and Prejudice and Zombies?

Bought it for my sister-in-law's birthday. Haven't gotten any feedback yet. She's a huge Jane Austen fan.

There's another book out now involving sea monsters. I forget which book it's based on.

[Beloit Fencer of Old]

Bought it for my sister-in-law's birthday. Haven't gotten any feedback yet. She's a huge Jane Austen fan.

There's another book out now involving sea monsters. I forget which book it's based on.

I believe that would be Sense and Sensibility. That poor Dashwood family!

[irishfolker]

I believe that would be Sense and Sensibility. That poor Dashwood family!

That's it! Thanks!

[warlordkenobi]

Somehow I get the feeling that armoring tools would be the best fencing-related anti-zombie weapons. I would expect that a battery operated soldering iron would go through the eye and into the brain quite nicely. It's a very short range melee weapon but against only one zombie in close quarters it would provide a very quick kill.

[K O'N]

Has anybody here read the book Pride and Prejudice and Zombies?

Yes. My Amazon review was:

"Zombies are just what P&P needed. The whole thing is much more satisfying this way. I always felt that all these people needed a smack; every one of them were idle and grasping, either kissing up to someone trying to get married or nobly *not* kissing up to someone trying to get married. Well bully for you, honey. Don't suppose you'd want to get a job, would you? No one in the whole damn (original) book does anything useful from one end to the other; they gossip and faint and fall in and out of love and visit each other for weeks on end and talk about who has how many thousands of pounds a year income, it's like a junior high society. Someone is doing all the work, but we're not interested in that, I guess. No one in the book is creative. No one works. No one makes art. No one does anything admirable with the money in any sort of a systematic way, and when someone does do something nice with a bit of his money it's like he's Jesus come again. I really rather strongly disliked all those people.

But with a plague of manky dreadfuls wandering about the place! Well, this is different. There's a danger, and the Bennet girls are defenders, that's excellent. Now Elizabeth really is useful, not just the least simpering of a bundle of parasitic decorations. Now Jane really is a considerable force, and her sunny outlook is all the more charming when combined with lethal Shaolin death dealing techniques, don't you think? Mr Darcy is dangerous, Bingley is nice but useless, Wickham ends up with the fate he actually deserves and Mrs de Bourg has ninjas, which you have to admit she'd love. Much improved over the original, I can't wait for the next one. "

So that's what I think.

K O'N

[Craig]

Somehow I get the feeling that armoring tools would be the best fencing-related anti-zombie weapons. I would expect that a battery operated soldering iron would go through the eye and into the brain quite nicely. It's a very short range melee weapon but against only one zombie in close quarters it would provide a very quick kill.

Just how fast is that going to heat up?

Now, a canting bar on the other hand...

[Purple Fencer]

"(2) Offer to buy them a beer. If they continue to shuffle towards you: zombie. If they accelerate: referee."


Could be an armorer, too, y'know...

[foibles]

Don't underestimate those decaying old Veteran Zombies.
They kill for food, but they keep score.

Yep. An old Zombie is still a Zombie.

[warlordkenobi]

Just how fast is that going to heat up?

Now, a canting bar on the other hand...

Obviously if there are many zombies the canting bar is always the better choice. If you are being ambushed by zombies the canting bar is also the better option but if there are only one or two zombies and you are the one doing the ambushing I would probably go with the soldering iron because of its greater likelihood for a one hit kill. If there is only one zombie between you and a vehicle or more powerful weapon, sneaking up behind it and ramming a soldering iron into its eye socket would be a quick and quiet way to overcome this obstacle.

[Fencergrl]

Yes... but don't must soldering guns have short cords? And don't forget the zombies working at the utility companies.... you may have no electricity.

[warlordkenobi]

battery operated soldering iron

said this already

[Superscribe]

I'm so glad this discussion has been legitimized. Allow me to add something more substantial than ridiculous discussions of chick books and knock off literature.

I would say the rules and strategies used in zombieland are pretty legit.

in times of trouble, you should stick with what you'd know. What do i know? Fencing, motorcycling, paintballing and just being awesome. I'd strap a holder for a flare on the end of my foil. I could stick a flare on the end of the foil. Then i'd put on a motorcycle helmet and armor on my arms, legs, and the meanest loincloth i could find. Such a set up allows me to focus on protecting my torso while stabbing and flicking to key areas on a zombie. Coincidentally, this is what i train to do almost every day of the week.

I'd wear court shoes for their fencing/running away ability.

I'd then load up my paintball gun with marbles. The trauma of a high velocity marble impacting a chest or head should not be neglected.

I'd also carry around a change of nice clothes and cologne. My primary focus would be to woo and knock up as many girls as possible, ensuring the survival of my lineage. Why should i work hard at surviving, when i can get a bunch of girls to work hard at surviving for me?

In that vein, it's also important to be able to have people like you and possess a well developed emotional intelligence. Working well in groups increases your likelihood of survival. Having people like you means they are less inclined to leave you behind when you sprain an ankle or something. Emotional intelligence means you'll have a better chance of discerning who's been bitten and slowly turning into a zombie, even when they don't admit it.

[noodle]

p.s.: http://digg.com/odd_stuff/Zombie_Sur...de_for_Fencers