Spill the Beans!

[Epee_Pox]

Tell the group a secret -- not about you, but about someone else.

Try to select a victim who we're not likely to know, and who's not likely to visit the forum, to minimize harm.

The more shocking or scandalous the secret, the better.

[Phantom5588]

...if I told you, it wouldn't be a secret, now would it?

I'd hate to think that someone would reveal anything secret about me for fun and games on a public forum...because then I would have to personally hunt them down and obliterate them from the face of the planet.

Not that I have any dirty little secrets...but if I did they would melt your filthy little earth brain.

[D'Art]

My old man's a dustman......

(rep for the first correct reply)

[latenight]

Black Sunshine has a fine film she wishes wasn't on the net.

[Black Sunshine]

Black Sunshine has a fine film she wishes wasn't on the net.

Only if you know where to look!

[magic_moose]

My old man's a dustman......

He wears a dustman's hat?

As Dickens would point out, our fortunes are hidden in dustpiles.

[Rabid Monk]

Phantom5588 once confided in me.

Told me about this one time when .... What? Where did you come from? What are you .... *guuaaaagghh*


... when nothing happened. A perfectly ordinary day. Sunny and warm. Phantom5588 is a really great and perfect person.











In all seriousness, I try not to say things behind someones back that I wouldn't say to their face.

[JackOfHearts]

*snatches fedora off of a hat stand and spins it around before flipping it on head*

It was a hot summer day. The sidewalk was blazing, you could cook two eggs and a side of bacon on it if you can find a spot clean enough. I had decided to step into my usual coffee shop for a white mocha, on the rocks, to help cool off. The dead air in the place kept it warm, but at least it wasn't as bad as it was outside in the sun. I undid the knot in my tie, letting it hang off my neck, before undoing the top two buttons of my shirt. I was taking in the first sip of my drink when the door flew open and a harried looking young man dashed in. He paused at the entrance, looking around before he spotted me, and ran over to my table. "Jack! You gotta help me! I'm in some major trouble, man!" I took a second to swirl my drink around, looking at its contents. "What is it this time, kid? It better be important, you're ruining a perfectly bad day." He pulled a chair from another table and sat down, his toe rapidly tapping the tile floor as a gallon of sweat poured down his forehead. "Remember that girl we saw the other night?" I rolled my eyes, and took another sip from my cup. "Look, if you can't keep it zipped, at least carry around some condoms. It shouldn't be too late for the morning after pill." I said. He slammed his fist on the table, drawing a glare from the establishments owner, as well as a few disapproving glances from the other patrons. "Don't jerk me around, this isn't funny, Jack!" I grabbed his hand, and with a well practiced move, applied pressure to his knuckles in just the right place. He grimaced with the pain, trying hard not to cry out. "Are you going to calm down now?" I asked him. He nodded and gasped when I released his hand. "Good. Now, what exactly is your problem? And use your inside voice." He rubbed the back of his hand and shot me a look before answering. "Okay, okay. You saw her right? She was smoking, you have to admit that, right?" I tilted my head at him, wondering what he was getting at. "If you like the stick insect, bottle blonde type. Enough stalling, what's the problem?" He started tapping his foot like a jack hammer again, looking around nervously. "We were in my car last night. I took her out driving, you know? We were up at Griffith park, I found a place to park, and, well, you know, right? So I reach down, and," He gulped so loud, I think the people smoking outside heard it. "And I reached down to her... But she... And... Oi..." I tried to hold it back. I put a hand over my mouth. Then the other one. Then I figured the hell with it, and started laughing. He got real steamed up at that, slamming the table again. "You know what? Forget you! I don't want your help anymore, and you'd better not say anything, got it!?" He stormed out the door and stumbled on the way out. I was still laughing when his shadow faded from view.

*Lifts his feet up on his desk, lowers his hat over his eyes, and slips off to dream land*

[magic_moose]

That's definitely worth rep, but I need to get out the butter knife first.

[matt9476]

edit.