new fencing dad going crazy - Fencing.Net Discussion
topleft topright

Go Back   Fencing.Net Discussion > General Fencing > Parent's Corner

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 08-14-2008, 03:58 PM   #1
Just Joined
 
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 3
omega303 is on a distinguished road
new fencing dad going crazy

My kids started fencing a few months ago and I'm not sure if the program is right for them.
The kids have a good time with the other kids but don't care for the coach and at times are left doing nothing on the sidelines.
I guess what we are looking for is bit more structure and a coach who seems to care.
Has anyone else had this problem and if you did what did you do?
omega303 is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
And now for this message...
Go Green members don't see these ads.


Old 08-14-2008, 04:17 PM   #2
Senior Member
 
Phincer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Posts: 318
Phincer has a reputation beyond reputePhincer has a reputation beyond reputePhincer has a reputation beyond reputePhincer has a reputation beyond reputePhincer has a reputation beyond reputePhincer has a reputation beyond reputePhincer has a reputation beyond reputePhincer has a reputation beyond reputePhincer has a reputation beyond reputePhincer has a reputation beyond reputePhincer has a reputation beyond repute
If the kids notice that not much is going on and they don't like the coach, then you might want to just have a chat with him/her and see what their philosophy of coaching entails. Maybe stay and observe a class or two.

If you don't get the warm fuzzy feeling that things will eventually go right, maybe its time to go shopping for a new club. Hopefully you have more than one in the area to choose from.

How long have they been taking lessons and what are their ages?
__________________
Phincer
Phincer is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 08-14-2008, 07:16 PM   #3
MdA
Senior Member
 
MdA's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: San Antonio
Posts: 687
MdA has a reputation beyond reputeMdA has a reputation beyond reputeMdA has a reputation beyond reputeMdA has a reputation beyond reputeMdA has a reputation beyond reputeMdA has a reputation beyond reputeMdA has a reputation beyond reputeMdA has a reputation beyond reputeMdA has a reputation beyond reputeMdA has a reputation beyond reputeMdA has a reputation beyond repute
Have your kids been to any organized competitions outside the club? Or have they only been fencing and taking classes at the club?

What is the size of the classes? Like Phincer's questions..what are the ages of you kids and the other fencers in the club and their classes?

Is there more than one coach in the club?
__________________
"...you must be a pirate for the pirate's code to apply and you're not. And thirdly, the code is more what you'd call "guidelines" than actual rules." Capt. Barbossa
MdA is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 08-14-2008, 10:58 PM   #4
Senior Member
 
MyrddinsPrecint's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Arlington, VA
Posts: 4,416
MyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond repute
Send a message via AIM to MyrddinsPrecint
Also kinda depends what you/they mean by "sitting on the sidelines"--- If people are bouting and there aren't enough strips/directors for everyone to fence at once, some people may be watching. You can learn a lot in the beginning by actually WATCHING other fencing, but if you're goofing off and talking, you don't learn much.

There's also organized streching or water break/attention break time that can look or feel like wasted time, but is actually quite important.

But I agree-- if you're feelin uncomfortable, and a talk with the coach doesn't make you feel better, start looking at other places.

Also... You might be exaggerating with "going crazy" in your thread title, but think carefully-- are you too invested? A month's worth of fencing is only going to help kids figure out if they want to keep fencing or not. They're going to be relearning what they're learning now for a good year. And depending on how young they are, the point of a fencing class is supposed to be fun, and that's about it. I obviously don't have enough information, but is more structure really needed?
__________________
Visit my non-fencing blog, mostly about food, at Coset The Table!
MyrddinsPrecint is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 08-15-2008, 04:46 AM   #5
Épéeist Hive Queen
 
Zilverzmurfen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Sweden
Posts: 12,759
Zilverzmurfen has a reputation beyond reputeZilverzmurfen has a reputation beyond reputeZilverzmurfen has a reputation beyond reputeZilverzmurfen has a reputation beyond reputeZilverzmurfen has a reputation beyond reputeZilverzmurfen has a reputation beyond reputeZilverzmurfen has a reputation beyond reputeZilverzmurfen has a reputation beyond reputeZilverzmurfen has a reputation beyond reputeZilverzmurfen has a reputation beyond reputeZilverzmurfen has a reputation beyond repute
Depending on the kids age "sitting by the sidelines" could just mean the child is too shy to participate in the actions going on on the floor or pistes. Some children are also "pouty" and stubborn and don't want to participate because their parents "forced" them to fencing.

You say they have a good time with the other kids, but do not care so much for the coach; perhaps they just enjoy getting playtime with the other kids and are really too young or simply un-interested in the actual fencing?

I'm not saying this is the case with your children, but all we can do here is make guesses since you didn't provide so much information.
__________________
Fencing is my only PvP.
Zilverzmurfen is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 08-15-2008, 07:09 AM   #6
Mo
Senior Member
 
Mo's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2001
Posts: 1,586
Mo has a reputation beyond reputeMo has a reputation beyond reputeMo has a reputation beyond reputeMo has a reputation beyond reputeMo has a reputation beyond reputeMo has a reputation beyond reputeMo has a reputation beyond reputeMo has a reputation beyond reputeMo has a reputation beyond reputeMo has a reputation beyond reputeMo has a reputation beyond repute
Quote:
Originally Posted by omega303 View Post
My kids started fencing a few months ago and I'm not sure if the program is right for them.
The kids have a good time with the other kids but don't care for the coach and at times are left doing nothing on the sidelines.
I guess what we are looking for is bit more structure and a coach who seems to care.
Has anyone else had this problem and if you did what did you do?
I would say stop now while you still have a chance. Take up hiking or backpacking or stamp collecting with your kids.
Sheesh buy a sailboat or something.
Stay away from fencing....
The Momster
__________________
A friend will bail you out of jail,
a true friend will help you hide the body...
: )
Mo is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 08-15-2008, 10:57 AM   #7
Senior Member
 
MyrddinsPrecint's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Arlington, VA
Posts: 4,416
MyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond repute
Send a message via AIM to MyrddinsPrecint
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mo View Post
I would say stop now while you still have a chance. Take up hiking or backpacking or stamp collecting with your kids.
Sheesh buy a sailboat or something.
Stay away from fencing....
The Momster
Ignore the woman behind that bronze curtain....
__________________
Visit my non-fencing blog, mostly about food, at Coset The Table!
MyrddinsPrecint is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 08-15-2008, 11:04 AM   #8
Just Joined
 
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 3
omega303 is on a distinguished road
WOW, Great way to help the sport grow,You should do PR for all youth fencing!
omega303 is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 08-15-2008, 11:48 AM   #9
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Illinois
Posts: 495
pokey has a reputation beyond reputepokey has a reputation beyond reputepokey has a reputation beyond reputepokey has a reputation beyond reputepokey has a reputation beyond reputepokey has a reputation beyond reputepokey has a reputation beyond reputepokey has a reputation beyond reputepokey has a reputation beyond reputepokey has a reputation beyond reputepokey has a reputation beyond repute
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mo View Post
Take up hiking or backpacking or stamp collecting with your kids.
Not to threadjack too much, but in the world of self-adhesive sticker stamps, is there really still stamp collecting to be done?

/Used to collect stamps the old fashioned way
pokey is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 08-15-2008, 01:35 PM   #10
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: MD
Posts: 1,092
SJCFU#2 has a reputation beyond reputeSJCFU#2 has a reputation beyond reputeSJCFU#2 has a reputation beyond reputeSJCFU#2 has a reputation beyond reputeSJCFU#2 has a reputation beyond reputeSJCFU#2 has a reputation beyond reputeSJCFU#2 has a reputation beyond reputeSJCFU#2 has a reputation beyond reputeSJCFU#2 has a reputation beyond reputeSJCFU#2 has a reputation beyond reputeSJCFU#2 has a reputation beyond repute
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mo View Post
Sheesh buy a sailboat or something.
I wouldn't recommend buying a sailboat as an alternative.

There's a reason why you hear so many jokes about the definition of a boat ("a hole in the water into which one pours money") and the happiest days of boat owner's life ("the day he buys it and the day he sells it"). And don't even get me started on the joys of owning a classic, wooden-hulled boat ("no thank you, I already have a full-time job").
SJCFU#2 is online now  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 08-15-2008, 05:06 PM   #11
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 377
dcmdale has a reputation beyond reputedcmdale has a reputation beyond reputedcmdale has a reputation beyond reputedcmdale has a reputation beyond reputedcmdale has a reputation beyond reputedcmdale has a reputation beyond reputedcmdale has a reputation beyond reputedcmdale has a reputation beyond reputedcmdale has a reputation beyond reputedcmdale has a reputation beyond reputedcmdale has a reputation beyond repute
Quote:
Originally Posted by omega303 View Post
WOW, Great way to help the sport grow,You should do PR for all youth fencing!
You have to realize her kid just took two bronze medals in Beijing.
__________________
--Be merciful to those who doubt. Jude 22.
dcmdale is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 08-15-2008, 06:12 PM   #12
Just Joined
 
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 3
omega303 is on a distinguished road
Better yet!!!
omega303 is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 08-16-2008, 12:17 PM   #13
Senior Member
 
TodG's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Helena MT
Posts: 137
TodG has a brilliant futureTodG has a brilliant futureTodG has a brilliant futureTodG has a brilliant futureTodG has a brilliant futureTodG has a brilliant futureTodG has a brilliant futureTodG has a brilliant futureTodG has a brilliant futureTodG has a brilliant futureTodG has a brilliant future
Have you considered fencing yourself? I've started teaching my kids, and now it is a family activity.
TodG is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 08-16-2008, 12:38 PM   #14
Just Joined
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 24
Tyldak is a name known to allTyldak is a name known to allTyldak is a name known to allTyldak is a name known to allTyldak is a name known to allTyldak is a name known to all
The rare times a parent approaches me about this, I suggest they watch a whole practice. Is the coach organized? Is there a lesson plan or curriculum? Do the kids have the same routine (e.g. warm-up, stretch, footwork, drills, bouting), or does the coach just "turn them loose" to do whatever while he/she gives private lessons? Having kids sit on the sidelines, watching other kids fence, and talking amongst themselves is not necessarily a bad thing. We all learn by watching other people fence and we all get more attached to/involved in the sport by forming social bonds. Does your kid have a sense of what he/she wants to achieve in fencing? Is the coach providing some help with forming those goals? Does the kid leave with a flush face, sweaty from a good workout, or does he/she leave with barely any sweat on his/her uniform?

IMHO, kids under 13 years should have very formally structured practices, with very little free time/chatting. 13ish to 15ish, they actually need a little more breathing space. By 16ish up, they are either a committed, self-motivated competitive fencer, or they are pretty much resigned to having fencing be their fun/social activity. That may change once they're in college. Anyway, the coach should be providing a lot of structure for younger kids, but don't expect as much structure for older kids.

As another poster said, ever consider taking up fencing yourself? It will help give you an idea of what all is involved in training...!

Just some thoughts.
Tyldak is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 08-16-2008, 06:14 PM   #15
Senior Member
 
MyrddinsPrecint's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Arlington, VA
Posts: 4,416
MyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond reputeMyrddinsPrecint has a reputation beyond repute
Send a message via AIM to MyrddinsPrecint
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tyldak View Post
IMHO, kids under 13 years should have very formally structured practices, with very little free time/chatting. 13ish to 15ish, they actually need a little more breathing space. By 16ish up, they are either a committed, self-motivated competitive fencer, or they are pretty much resigned to having fencing be their fun/social activity. That may change once they're in college. Anyway, the coach should be providing a lot of structure for younger kids, but don't expect as much structure for older kids.
And of course there's the kids under 10 (and sometimes the 11 and 12 year olds, depending on maturity) that should really mostly be doing structured play that kind of has some fencing involved. Some of the really little kids can do things like lessons. Most can't. You want them to have fun, and learn a little something. You don't want them to be pressured until they hate it. That's what happened for me and Ballet...
__________________
Visit my non-fencing blog, mostly about food, at Coset The Table!
MyrddinsPrecint is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 08-16-2008, 08:48 PM   #16
Senior Member
 
ESLyon's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Wichita, KS
Posts: 190
ESLyon has a reputation beyond reputeESLyon has a reputation beyond reputeESLyon has a reputation beyond reputeESLyon has a reputation beyond reputeESLyon has a reputation beyond reputeESLyon has a reputation beyond reputeESLyon has a reputation beyond reputeESLyon has a reputation beyond reputeESLyon has a reputation beyond reputeESLyon has a reputation beyond reputeESLyon has a reputation beyond repute
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tyldak View Post
IMHO, kids under 13 years should have very formally structured practices, with very little free time/chatting. 13ish to 15ish, they actually need a little more breathing space. By 16ish up, they are either a committed, self-motivated competitive fencer, or they are pretty much resigned to having fencing be their fun/social activity. That may change once they're in college. Anyway, the coach should be providing a lot of structure for younger kids, but don't expect as much structure for older kids.
Tyldak, I do not mean to argue, just another opinion, which may or may not transfer to fencing, seeing as I have little experience as of yet in this sport.

I cannot speak as a fencing coach, but I have taught gymnastics to kids of all ages for four years... I would say that kids start gymnastics much younger than fencing (some as young as one year old, most higher-level gymnasts have been doing it since the ages of 4-6) But generally, when someone starts gymnastics in the beginner classes at a young age, (2-6 years) less structure and more "fun" time is used, simply to keep the kids interested and having fun, and this sometimes means letting them have a rest, roam "free" on an obstacle course, or talking to them about things while they seemingly "do nothing".

I guess what I'm trying to say is just because they seem to be sitting on the sidelines does not mean they are doing nothing. Like many others have suggested, I would recommend talking to the coach and letting him/her know your concerns. I know as a coach (again, gymnastics coach) that if someone who pays for my check talks to me and feels something is wrong, I am going to listen and if possible, (which it not always is) acommodate their request. Any coach, in my humble opinion, who does not listen to the customer quite frankly does not deserve your business. And keep in mind sometimes I would listen to a parents request, talk to them, and decide that that was not in the best interest of their child's development, and I would tell that parent of my decision, albeit respectively. Give respect where you expect it back, and vice versa, but sometimes, things just don't work, and you may want to consider other sports.
ESLyon is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 08-20-2008, 11:04 PM   #17
Senior Member
 
brtech's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Posts: 987
brtech has a reputation beyond reputebrtech has a reputation beyond reputebrtech has a reputation beyond reputebrtech has a reputation beyond reputebrtech has a reputation beyond reputebrtech has a reputation beyond reputebrtech has a reputation beyond reputebrtech has a reputation beyond reputebrtech has a reputation beyond reputebrtech has a reputation beyond reputebrtech has a reputation beyond repute
Quote:
Originally Posted by SJCFU#2 View Post
I wouldn't recommend buying a sailboat as an alternative.

There's a reason why you hear so many jokes about the definition of a boat ("a hole in the water into which one pours money") and the happiest days of boat owner's life ("the day he buys it and the day he sells it"). And don't even get me started on the joys of owning a classic, wooden-hulled boat ("no thank you, I already have a full-time job").
Okay, I will share with you the BEST name for a boat, since it is clear you have owned one. And the winner is:
Never Again II
brtech is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 08-21-2008, 12:09 AM   #18
Senior Member
 
HookUpandFence's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: On Deck
Posts: 102
HookUpandFence has much to be proud ofHookUpandFence has much to be proud ofHookUpandFence has much to be proud ofHookUpandFence has much to be proud ofHookUpandFence has much to be proud ofHookUpandFence has much to be proud ofHookUpandFence has much to be proud ofHookUpandFence has much to be proud ofHookUpandFence has much to be proud ofHookUpandFence has much to be proud of
I started, mostly to give myself something to do while my then 10yr old fenced (and to loose weight)
We were pretty unstructured, but Coach appointed me captain after I figured out what I was doing and then I would lead some group activities (or simply encourage more fencing/less goofing off) while Coach did the lesson things. But the thing was, Coach was always very attentive to the room as a whole, even during lessons. The general rule for the kids was:
Fence first, then play.
I think it worked well.
__________________
-)——
http://tamedracingdriver.com/fakefactsig.php
HookUpandFence is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 08-21-2008, 09:48 AM   #19
Senior Member
 
TBean's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 1,305
TBean has a reputation beyond reputeTBean has a reputation beyond reputeTBean has a reputation beyond reputeTBean has a reputation beyond reputeTBean has a reputation beyond reputeTBean has a reputation beyond reputeTBean has a reputation beyond reputeTBean has a reputation beyond reputeTBean has a reputation beyond reputeTBean has a reputation beyond reputeTBean has a reputation beyond repute
Talk to the coach about what is the teaching plan. I'm not sure from your post if you have watched an entire class or perhaps just the end when your kids are maybe at the point where they are bouting and waiting for an opponent?

Different clubs take different approaches - out club is fairly structured. Others are more loosely organized.
__________________
I think that the film Clueless was very deep. I think it was deep in the way that it was very light. I think lightness has to come from a very deep place if it's true lightness. - Alicia Silverstone
TBean is online now  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
I love seeing parents 'involved' in fencing with their kids, but this guy is crazy. Got_Fenced_In Fencing Discussion 45 10-23-2007 07:23 PM
Crazy mishaps! PeterGustafsson Water Cooler 1 12-04-2005 11:55 AM
That's Crazy!!! D'Artagnan1673 Water Cooler 5 11-12-2002 03:42 PM
Hey this is Crazy Whacker AguynamedDylan Water Cooler 11 11-04-2002 05:19 PM
To the Crazy Wacker Sabress Discussion Archive 25 04-16-2002 06:55 PM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 12:49 PM.


(c) 1995 - 2007 Fencing Net; Fencing.Net, fdn, Fencing101, Epee101, Foil101, Sabre101 are all trademarks of Fencing.Net, LLC.
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.0
Copyright ©2000 - 2008, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd. - Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.2.0 RC5 -    Medieval Swords from the online Replica Sword Shop