Arconian Jokes

[Lord Tellurine]

Overheard at the Arconia Greyhound Coach Depot:

"The coach for the Arconia Countryside is leaving at 9:30am. The coach for Schoolcraftia is leaving at 10:15am. The coach for Muu is leaving when the big hand is on the eleven and the little hand is on the three."

[Lord Tellurine]

Peasant: Doctor, you gotta help me! I need glasses.
Doctor: You sure do. This is a blacksmith.

[George Washington]

You left out the biggest joke of all.

Guess..............bzzzzzt
ARCON.

[Lord Tellurine]

A man walking along the Arconian Highway through the countryside sees a farmer in his front yard lifting his pig to an apple tree so it can get an apple. He sets the pig down and the pig eats the apple. When the pig is done, the farmer lifts the pig up again so it can get another apple. The man walks up to the farmer and asks, "Doesn't it take a long time to feed a pig like that?"

"Sure," answers the farmer, "but what's time to a pig?

[NewKnight15]

hahaha ok i got the blacksmith one and that was even funny buti didnt get the train station one.

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~Toma El Riesgo~

[George Washington]

I will now condesend and explain the joke to New-Knight official Arcon licker.

The joke is that instead of telling what time it was to the Muu travelers he instead simply describes what the clock looks like as that is the level of their intellect.

You may now lick my arcon.

[Lord Tellurine]

Have you heard about the liberal Muu church?

They have seven commandments and three suggestions.

[George Washington]

There are three Arconian mothers bragging about their sons. The first one says, "My son is very successful. He is the best lawyer in Arconia."

The second one says, "My son has done better than that. He is the best Doctor in Arconia."

Arcon's mom beaming with pride says, "Well, my son has not done that well. He does not have a very good job, and he is homosexual. But he has these two great boyfriends... One is the best lawyer in Castle, and the other is the best doctor in the Castle."
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[Lord Tellurine]

A peasant walks up to an aristocrat holding a newspaper in the Arconian Square. The peasants asks, "Could you tell me what day is today."

The aristocrat says, "No. I'm sorry I cannot."

The peasant says, "But you have a newspaper."

"True," the aristocrat answers, "but it is yesterday's paper."

[martha washington]

as your estranged wife george, i'm asking you to stop and leave arcon alone, before he sues you, i will testify on his behalf, right is right, wrong is wrong, you're wrong and you should leave the arcon alone.

[George Washington]

Uhhh???

Last I checked fictional people can't sue each-other.

Wait here's a supoena from my shadow.

lick my moldy arcon

[arcon]

Martha , thanks for your support. Ive survived about a dozen characters like this one(you know who). What you dont feed dies.

Arcon of Arconia

[NewKnight15]

youve got to admit it was funny. But why do you always pick on Arcon? just wondering. Do you always pick on people that are better then you

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~Toma El Riesgo~

[martha washington]

yes they can george, i won't explain it, but they can, it's sad but true, so if you're a deflated rejected lover, or were roundly, soundly "pounded" on the piste, I would try to get over it, and work on your lunge.

[Lord Tellurine]

Did you hear why Ivanhoe was banned from the Arconia Public Library?

It has too much Saxon violence.

[ 07-24-2001: Message edited by: Lord Tellurine ]

[George Washington]

Moonitic, Willow, and Dame were all pregnant and sitting in the gynecologists waiting room. Willow commented, "I'm going to have a boy." "How do you know?" asked Dame. "Because when my husband and I were makin love, I was on top.

"That means I'm going to have a girl," replied Dame, "because when we were making love, I was on the bottom."

Moonitic started to cry. "What's wrong?" asked the others. Moon wept, "I'm going to have puppies!"

Ha-ha-ha-ha

[SteveMcDonough]

That was just crap, Georgie baby.

Anyway.

A Muuan, Fencingsucker, and George Washington were stranded on a beach. They came upon a lamp, which one of them picked up and cleaned it, releasing a Genie from inside.
"I can grant you all a wish each" he said to them.

"I wana bee Intelyjent" begged Georgie baby.
The Genie thought this was impossible, but tried it anyway, and using ALL of his power, managed to turn him into a Fencingsucker. George was happy with this, and swam to safety.

After a year or so, when the Genie had regained all of his power...

"I wanna be really intelligent" said the Fencingsucker. The Genie, who thought this was a bit easier than the first wish, turned him into a Muuan, who built a raft, and paddled to the other side.

"I guess you want to be really, really, REALLY intelligent?" he said to the Muuan exhaustedly, who just stood there picking his nose. After a long pause, the Muuan said "yes". The Genie turned him into an Arconian and he walked over the bridge.

Steve. stand-up comic.

[Iwant2bafencer]

You tell 'em Steve.
I don't write very good jokes but keep it up everyone.
Lady Rosaline

[its_me_mango]

i see i was rated a 5 for that, Hi, I'm also Martha Washington. How dare you!
Now go back in all of you and give its_me_mango, my alter-ego a nice 5, I can't believe it, now i'm going to resond as mango to the rest of this nuttyness

[its_me_mango]

i have never told a joke about another person in my life, you want to know why? because i know that the minute you open your mouth and say something about someone else, it'll come back.