07-03-2008, 05:23 PM
|
#541 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: SF bay wine country
Posts: 294
| Quote:
Originally Posted by Fencergrl  Dear Cougar Bait Rookie,
Your blonde cougar seems to enjoy creative men. So use your creativity to win her heart (or at least deceive her into meeting with you). Looking over the charities she supports PETA, Stop globalwarming.org., STAR (Standing for Truth about Radiation).... I would claim to be in charge of a charity looking to save cute little baby polar bears from global warming and radiation and set up a meeting with her, that would allow you to make your move.
I am certain she will find your charity and you irresistible. Failing that... I'm sure your cellmate "Bubba" at the NY jailhouse will.  | Since our sponsor is a cougar rather than a cougar stalker, I think she is only partially correct here. The main idea of a charity is good. But don't forget the main cougar bait: Chardonnay. You can lure these women of 'a certain vintage' out of their dens with wee drops of this illustrious liqueur, and, of course, requisite look of complete rapture as they regale you with fablieaux of evil ex lovers.
Then wait. Yes, wait until she spills that first sparkling drop of white wine, and then you strike.
"Ooh yes", you might say, "I am founding an organization to save the endangered Chardonnay vineyards of Marysville, where there is a terrible plague of infestuous infestations .... " Try not to drool during this part, like me and my mate JJ. When it mixes with the Chardonnay it makes a poisonous cocktail.
Well good luck. This doesn't work very well for me either, but I try sometimes just to see if I can get one to purr. A sharp snap of the teeth might be good too. I've never tried to pet one, though, because they look awfully mean in the morning, especially around the eyes.
Happy hunting.
Sam | 
|  | | And now for this message... |
| |
07-03-2008, 05:45 PM
|
#542 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Cougar Country
Posts: 8,689
| Sam, m'dear you obviously amuse me often enough that I have to spread some more rep lovin' around before I can give you some for that last post. So here you go....
__________________
If Joan of Arc could turn the tide of an entire war before her 18th. birthday, you can get out of bed.
~E. Jean Carroll
It's psychosomatic. You need a lobotomy. I'll get a saw. ~Calvin & Hobbes | |
| | |
07-03-2008, 05:48 PM
|
#543 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: SF bay wine country
Posts: 294
| Quote:
Originally Posted by Fencergrl Sam, m'dear you obviously amuse me often enough that I have to spread some more rep lovin' around before I can give you some for that last post. So here you go.... | Why thank you. I can't wait till you have a competition for all ages up your way, and I can scramble the cash to come.
Sam | |
| | |
07-03-2008, 05:50 PM
|
#544 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Cougar Country
Posts: 8,689
| Perhaps we can compromise and meet in Seattle some time... considering how the US $ is doing and all. 
__________________
If Joan of Arc could turn the tide of an entire war before her 18th. birthday, you can get out of bed.
~E. Jean Carroll
It's psychosomatic. You need a lobotomy. I'll get a saw. ~Calvin & Hobbes | |
| | |
07-03-2008, 06:06 PM
|
#545 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: SF bay wine country
Posts: 294
| Quote:
Originally Posted by Fencergrl Perhaps we can compromise and meet in Seattle some time... considering how the US $ is doing and all. | I will try to remember the wine.
Sam | |
| | |
07-03-2008, 08:41 PM
|
#546 | | Senior Member
Join Date: May 2007 Location: Eugene, OR
Posts: 812
| There's always the Leon Auriole open...
Huge open tournament in Seattle in September. Something like 80-90 fencers went to last years. Actually, that's just epee.
__________________
"When Fascism comes to America, it will come wrapped in the flag and bearing a cross."
| 
| | |
07-03-2008, 09:02 PM
|
#547 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: SF bay wine country
Posts: 294
| Quote:
Originally Posted by Nolano There's always the Leon Auriole open...
Huge open tournament in Seattle in September. Something like 80-90 fencers went to last years. Actually, that's just epee. | I heard Seattle fencing was pretty awesome.
Sam | |
| | |
07-05-2008, 10:41 PM
|
#548 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: the Salle(I no longer have a home address)
Posts: 1,073
| Quote:
Originally Posted by Nolano There's always the Leon Auriole open...
Huge open tournament in Seattle in September. Something like 80-90 fencers went to last years. Actually, that's just epee. | Sounds like fun. I've not been there in years. But I'm having a problem locating it on AskFred. Can you give a pointer to any website covering it
__________________
J Jefferies | |
| | |
07-05-2008, 10:57 PM
|
#549 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Cougar Country
Posts: 8,689
| Quote:
Originally Posted by jjefferies Sounds like fun. I've not been there in years. But I'm having a problem locating it on AskFred. Can you give a pointer to any website covering it | Dear Problem with finding fun,
It's not listed yet. Auriol's website is: http://salleauriol.com, if you're interested.
__________________
If Joan of Arc could turn the tide of an entire war before her 18th. birthday, you can get out of bed.
~E. Jean Carroll
It's psychosomatic. You need a lobotomy. I'll get a saw. ~Calvin & Hobbes | |
| | |
07-06-2008, 01:03 AM
|
#550 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: the Salle(I no longer have a home address)
Posts: 1,073
| Quote:
Originally Posted by Fencergrl Dear Problem with finding fun,
It's not listed yet. Auriol's website is: http://salleauriol.com, if you're interested. | Well even with your help I didn't find the actual event. But I did find
"Leon Maitre dinner series - April 2008-04-14 13:56:21
Leon Auriol has agreed to do another installment of his acclaimed dinner series. Many of you are familiar with his 4 course French cuisine dinners and their popularity. The dinner includes wine and, at a total price of $35, it’s also one of the best dining out deals in town!"
Which sounds absolutely intriguing. Maybe we should go just for the dinner. Sam you available?
__________________
J Jefferies | |
| | |
07-06-2008, 03:20 AM
|
#551 | | Senior Member
Join Date: May 2007 Location: Eugene, OR
Posts: 812
| Yeah, it's not up yet. http://askfred.net/Results/results.p...nament_id=3865
There's last years. I might be there, depending on whether I can get a ride.
__________________
"When Fascism comes to America, it will come wrapped in the flag and bearing a cross."
| |
| | |
07-06-2008, 02:15 PM
|
#552 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Cougar Country
Posts: 8,689
| Quote:
Originally Posted by jjefferies Which sounds absolutely intriguing. Maybe we should go just for the dinner. Sam you available? | What! 
I'm being dumped???? Sam's real nice and all... it's just... I thought we had something special, jjefferies... sniff... 
__________________
If Joan of Arc could turn the tide of an entire war before her 18th. birthday, you can get out of bed.
~E. Jean Carroll
It's psychosomatic. You need a lobotomy. I'll get a saw. ~Calvin & Hobbes | |
| | |
07-06-2008, 07:54 PM
|
#553 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: SF bay wine country
Posts: 294
| Quote:
Originally Posted by Fencergrl What!
I'm being dumped???? Sam's real nice and all... it's just... I thought we had something special, jjefferies... sniff... | You rang? Dinner and drinks?
At 8 FencerGrl, do you need a booster seat, or are you already up to the table? JJ doesn't drink. He says he does, but then he always gets a coke.
That leaves me alone with the Chardonnay or if you buy me a beer I'll play the piano. Then you can buy me 2 beers not to sing. You have to close the lid to make me stop playing the piano though. I am kind of a slow stopper.
Sam | |
| | |
07-07-2008, 04:22 AM
|
#554 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: right here, on your screen
Posts: 1,642
| Quote:
Originally Posted by rdg I am kind of a slow stopper | Hmm, I recall you stopping mid-fleche ... on my point 
__________________
Cross me and you'll find that under this playful boyish exterior beats the heart of a ruthless sadistic maniac. ~Blackadder http://fencingblog.wordpress.com | |
| | |
07-07-2008, 04:29 AM
|
#555 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Emptyfrikkenwalletland
Posts: 240
| Hi FG
I have been away guarding the nothern borders. Nothing but bites and scratches from chardonnay soak cougars.
What's been happening?
EW | |
| | |
07-07-2008, 07:22 AM
|
#556 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Boston, MA
Posts: 4,325
| Quote:
Originally Posted by Fencergrl What!
I'm being dumped???? Sam's real nice and all... it's just... I thought we had something special, jjefferies... sniff... |
3 is more fun?
(duck) | |
| | |
07-07-2008, 04:59 PM
|
#557 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Cougar Country
Posts: 8,689
| Quote:
Originally Posted by telkanuru 3 is more fun?
(duck) | Dear Duck,
Three is wayyy more fun, especially for me  (as I presume the other two posters are male). However, my whimpering was because it looked like they were running off together leaving me without dinner company.
__________________
If Joan of Arc could turn the tide of an entire war before her 18th. birthday, you can get out of bed.
~E. Jean Carroll
It's psychosomatic. You need a lobotomy. I'll get a saw. ~Calvin & Hobbes
Last edited by Fencergrl; 07-07-2008 at 05:15 PM.
| |
| | |
07-07-2008, 05:14 PM
|
#558 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Cougar Country
Posts: 8,689
| Quote:
Originally Posted by Empty Wallet Hi FG
I have been away guarding the nothern borders. Nothing but bites and scratches from chardonnay soak cougars.
What's been happening?
EW | Dear Battle Worn,
Cougars like to bite and scratch. It's their nature.
If you are particularly tasty, you are likely get pounced. A sure sign is a cougar's bottom/ tail will twitch prior to pouncing. Watch for this, otherwise it can catch you unaware and suddenly you've taken an unexpected tumble.
Even if you are adapt at noticing the tell-tale signs, you are likely to be left breathless, smelling faintly of expensive perfume and Chardonnay and sporting bruises and scratches you don't remember getting. Make sure you drink plenty of water after a cougar encounter, as they tend to drain you of fluids.
__________________
If Joan of Arc could turn the tide of an entire war before her 18th. birthday, you can get out of bed.
~E. Jean Carroll
It's psychosomatic. You need a lobotomy. I'll get a saw. ~Calvin & Hobbes | |
| | |
07-07-2008, 05:30 PM
|
#559 | | Senior Member
Join Date: May 2007 Location: Cubicle 13A on the 13th floor
Posts: 3,551
| Dear FG,
Is me or it seems that people on the main forum don't have... (what's a good word...) humor, much? Or is my delivery too subtle?
Laughing in the inside
__________________
"That's because my project is a flailing corpse of misery, and my boss donated his brain to a gum museum. If I had a good attitude in this situation, it would be a sign of mental imbalance. My bad attitude is proof that I am thinking clearly. Are you going to compliment me on my clarity or demand I be irrational?" -Dilbert, January 8th, 2008
| |
| | |
07-07-2008, 05:39 PM
|
#560 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Cougar Country
Posts: 8,689
| |
