Fencing.Net - Your Guide to Fencing & Fencing Equipment

Fencergrl · 06-26-2008, 07:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Empty Wallet

Dear FG

as you seem to have time on your hands, do you think you can solve the mystery of the sneaker feet washing up on BC beaches next week?

EW

Dear Foot Fetish,

Canada recently took bronze in Montreal in the Men's epee team event. This has never happened. Large feet in sneakers also started showing up on our shores. This also has never happened before. Coincidence? I think not!

What I haven't figured out is if these feet belonged to our competition or some strict crazy European coach running the feet off of his fencers.

Fencergrl · 06-26-2008, 07:15 PM

Here's a picture of the team. http://www.dynamofencing.com

Two of the guys on the far left are kinda leaning on each other... as if for support? And did you see the coach on the far right? He looks like he's the type to work his fencers until their feet fell off. Doesn't he??? He consistently turns out successful fencers... plus his club is on an island... lots and lots of river access. Did you also notice that the coach's son is standing straight? You can bet he got to keep his feet!

Just throwing that out there....

Empty Wallet · 06-27-2008, 07:31 PM

Dear FG

this is getting more and more worriesome. I thought that it may have been a "Murder She Wrote" scenario on BC. Now it is getting murkier than Watergate or who was on the grassy knoll?

But it is worriesome as the 14 y/o boy is taking an unseemly interest in epee. Has given over his pirate ways and wants to bounce like Tigger instead.

So I am worried about his size 17s. I am also worried about his potential multi-million dolar career as an Olympic race walker.

Should I ban epee? Should we secede from Canadia and would that help. Should I cease singing Fats Waller to him?

EW

Regarding my biography. I have to pay for the girls because she is sweet and nice and Daddy's little angel. The boy is a boy, he charms free lessons in his Oliver mode, or steals as the Artful Dodger (should not have shown him that film)

Fencergrl · 06-27-2008, 08:11 PM

Dear EW,

From your last post, I see that Canada Day drinking has begun. Lets start this weekend off with some loud singing of "Oh Canada"... altogether now...

Oh Canada! Our home and native land....

lindajdunn · 06-29-2008, 12:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fencergrl

I did see it... I considered posting that link, but I was looking for something more along the lines of Needle's clip.

As for cougar relatives... My grandmother was also a cougar and so is my aunt.

There's a fairly new clip at fox news.

http://www.foxnews.com/video2/video0...w.foxnews.com/

Linda Franklin defines a cougar.

http://www.therealcougarwoman.com

Mo · 07-01-2008, 02:22 AM

Dear Fencer Girl,
My son brought home a kitten from his girlfriend's apartment complex. The cat was supposed to go live with someone else but after three months she was still there and I called her mine and named her Barbara Jean.
Barbara Jean decided to go out and get knocked up before I had enough money to get her fixed and now I have three 10 week old kittens named Boris Junior, Twinkie and Chutney.
My son's girlfriend has promised to give Chutney a home so that part is good.
The bad part is I am just too attached the Boris Junior, nick named "Little Bore" and Twink. They are so cute and adorable!! They are funny and entertain me. They also love to climb all over the bed and wrestle as soon as the sun comes up.
My old cat Mr. Bigglesworth (named by my daughter when she was 7) and my son's cat Grendal live with me too. They are both 11 years old. We found them abandoned at a rest stop in Wyoming 11 years ago.
Right now in our house we have six kitties. Two will be moving out soon and I will be down to four kitties....
Is that too many?? They are not cougars after all. What do you think??
I have a possible home for Boris Junior and Twink but one of my kids has already moved out and the other is going to college in the fall.
Should I resign myself to my fate and become the Moderately Older Woman with a hella lot of cats??
Should I feather my nest with fur??
I have two dogs, and a whole bunch of bigass fish too.
What do you think??
The Momster

Pescados666 · 07-01-2008, 03:51 AM

Dear FG,
I'm being forced to have a sleep over with my sisters male friend. She has girls in her room, so you can see why he can't stay there. How can I get out of this?

Signed,
Homophobic in Houston

bigdawg2121 · 07-01-2008, 04:04 AM

I LOLd....I'll give you the benefit of a doubt and assume he's clearly gay and open about it but regardless, chillax. Unless he's clearly interested in you or all up on your side of the bed it's probably nothing to worry about. Chances he's gonna try to jump your bones just b/c he can are pretty slim and you might just make a new friend that may one day introduce you to all kinds of gorgeous womenfolks.

Fencergrl · 07-01-2008, 02:08 PM

Dear Catwoman,

I must admit I was unsure how to answer your question. Personally, I enjoy having a houseful of animals, but the menfolk around you may feel different. So I asked my husband what he thought.

At first I wasn't sure he was paying attention as he seemed rather engrossed in his online game... but when he assured me that you can't have too much pussy... I knew for certain he had understood the question and that I was on the right track in advising you.

So enjoy your animals! Rest assured that your husband will be happy surrounded by warm, friendly pussies.

Fencergrl · 07-01-2008, 02:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pescados666

Dear FG,
I'm being forced to have a sleep over with my sisters male friend. She has girls in her room, so you can see why he can't stay there. How can I get out of this?

Signed,
Homophobic in Houston

Dear Homophobic in Houston,

There's no need to be afraid of homogenized milk. You are rather thin and could use the extra calories.

As for your concern with having a sleep-over. Try breaking the ice with braiding each other's hair and making smores.

Mo · 07-01-2008, 02:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fencergrl

Dear Catwoman,

I must admit I was unsure how to answer your question. Personally, I enjoy having a houseful of animals, but the menfolk around you may feel different. So I asked my husband what he thought.

At first I wasn't sure he was paying attention as he seemed rather engrossed in his online game... but when he assured me that you can't have too much pussy... I knew for certain he had understood the question and that I was on the right track in advising you.

So enjoy your animals! Rest assured that your husband will be happy surrounded by warm, friendly pussies.

OMG!!! YOu did it.
I am glad we didn't really bet anything... but wait, I think you should get a nice warm...... KITTY KAT!!!
Look in your mail...
The Momster

Fencergrl · 07-01-2008, 03:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mo

OMG!!! YOu did it.
I am glad we didn't really bet anything... but wait, I think you should get a nice warm...... KITTY KAT!!!
Look in your mail...
The Momster

There's some people I won't ever give you my last name, address, e-mail address or phone number... You may have just made that list!

Pescados666 · 07-01-2008, 09:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fencergrl

Dear Homophobic in Houston,

There's no need to be afraid of homogenized milk. You are rather thin and could use the extra calories.

As for your concern with having a sleep-over. Try breaking the ice with braiding each other's hair and making smores.

I just cut my hair, so it's no longer braidable. I just avoided the matter by staying up to 6 am and sleeping then.

KidLazy · 07-02-2008, 02:02 PM

Dear Fencergrl,

Is just me or does Christie Brinkley looks really good even at 54? Now that she will be single soon, and hopefully with tons money from her soon-to-be-legally-ex-husband, what chance do you think I would have? How should I proceed to make it happen?

Really wants to retire from real work soon

Fencergrl · 07-02-2008, 02:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KidLazy

Dear Fencergrl,

Is just me or does Christie Brinkley looks really good even at 54? Now that she will be single soon, and hopefully with tons money from her soon-to-be-legally-ex-husband, what chance do you think I would have? How should I proceed to make it happen?

Really wants to retire from real work soon

Dear Cougar Bait,

I think you should proceed while in a dimly lit room... as you know cougars like those surroundings. Make sure that you never add "for your age" after telling her how great she looks. Lastly ensure that you're at your peak physical shape... women of her vintage have a very healthy sexual appetite.

Falchion · 07-02-2008, 05:10 PM

Dear Fencergrl,

Two of my friends have separately asked me to go to the same destination for the Fourth of July (weird I know). One group will consist of he and his pregnant wife, while the other group will consist of he and his three year old child (he is currently having marital issues and wants to get away for the weekend).

I consider each of them to be good friends of mine, but the thought of either option frightens me, given that they both will most likely be mentally taxing on a weekend where I would otherwise like to bask in my own solace. How do I tell both groups that I am otherwise engaged while not seeming too disingenuous? Am I a bad person?

Fencergrl · 07-02-2008, 05:22 PM

Dear Evil One,

Quote:

Am I a bad person?

Of course you are... plus you suffer from delusions of grandeur as many foil-its on f-net seem to... they seem to need to compensate for their lack of weapon size.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Falchion

My foil is sharp. I am poised for battle, filled with daring do and the need to lunge at unwitting epeests and sabreurs with equal abandon.

I suspect you made your question up, so people will think you have friends. However...in the off chance someone who seek the company of a foil-it I suggest you correct their lack of good judgement and decline. Solitude serves foil-its well. No one around to bring them back to reality and away from the glorious battlefields in their minds.

KidLazy · 07-02-2008, 09:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fencergrl

Dear Cougar Bait,

I think you should proceed while in a dimly lit room... as you know cougars like those surroundings. Make sure that you never add "for your age" after telling her how great she looks. Lastly ensure that you're at your peak physical shape... women of her vintage have a very healthy sexual appetite.

Dear Fencergrl,

I have that part covered already, even the endurance part.

I was asking for advice on how to stand out for a cougar like that. As the news of her divorce trial spread, more and more Cougar Baits/Hunters (depending on how you look at it) will be camping at the door step of her $30 million home in Hampton. I am not tall (barely 6'1"). I don't have overgrown muscle, strange eye colors (just shining and reflective dark brown), and/or excessive personality/humor (rather subtle in the delivery). So how do I get her to notice me and me only?

Cougar Bait Rookie

Fencergrl · 07-03-2008, 12:41 AM

Dear Cougar Bait Rookie,

Your blonde cougar seems to enjoy creative men. So use your creativity to win her heart (or at least deceive her into meeting with you). Looking over the charities she supports PETA, Stop globalwarming.org., STAR (Standing for Truth about Radiation).... I would claim to be in charge of a charity looking to save cute little baby polar bears from global warming and radiation and set up a meeting with her, that would allow you to make your move.

I am certain she will find your charity and you irresistible. Failing that... I'm sure your cellmate "Bubba" at the NY jailhouse will.