06-11-2007, 01:19 PM
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#1 | | Senior Member
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 117
| How many different ways can YOU think of? How many different ways can you think of to turn a pack of playing cards into a weapon? I'll start it off with just two.
Throwing a card at someone's face (obvious).
Spraying the cards at their face in order to escape (ala Caltrops.)
This sounded like a good idea at the time. |
| | | And now for this message... | |
06-11-2007, 01:20 PM
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#2 | | Senior Member
Join Date: May 2007 Location: Houston
Posts: 566
| Throw the entire deck (still in the box) at someones face. It'd hurt...I guess.
Fan them out, and use them like the chinese fan weapon thing!
I'm so awesome it hurts! |
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06-11-2007, 01:58 PM
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#3 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Passing you on the inside... vroom
Posts: 1,299
| Get an old deck of cards from before the 1950s. The paper and ink they used to use are crucial for this to work.
Get a short length of lead pipe, threaded at both ends.
Shred the entire deck of cards into confetti-sized pieces.
Mix the shredded cards with ordinary room-temperature (not hot!) tap water, gently mixing until it gets a paste-like consistency.
Fill the lead pipe with your paste in a room-temperature or cooler room.
Securely cap both ends with lead pipe caps. Use extra-strong thread lock (a special glue found in most auto supply stores, bonds nuts and bolts in the absence of oxygen) to make a tight seal.
Your playing-card pipe bomb will explode with violent force and lethal shrapnel when heated. So don't try this at home, kids.
Now I have to ask, why do you want to know? [And caltrops are spikes used to puncture pursuing feet/tires, not really something sprayed at a pursuer's face.]
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Last edited by scrapinpeg; 06-11-2007 at 07:53 PM.
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06-11-2007, 02:37 PM
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#4 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Hideaway, TX
Posts: 130
| Mr. Scrapinpeg:
I do believe that you are unaware that the mere suggestion of an explosive device (as you described) is inappropriate for this thread. The federal authorities of the USA take umbrage to such advice. And the potential liability factor should be sufficient to discourage such practice/advice. |
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06-11-2007, 05:21 PM
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#5 | | Senior Member
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 117
| It was supposed to be a game of ridiculous creative suggestions originally. The caltrop reference was more in a "throw and escape" type of suggestion rather than their literal physical appearance. I guess I expected it to be more silly than serious. I have no intention of using cards for weapons; I'm fairly sure a bit of wood would prove far more deadly (street fencing fo life). Your suggestion, however, scares me.
I thought of another one. Many of you have seen the Magician who drops his cards, only to reveal they all stick together end to end. Now, imagine using this as a bullwhip-esque weapon! Much more, set it aflame, and yes. A flaming whip. |
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06-11-2007, 05:29 PM
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#6 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Passing you on the inside... vroom
Posts: 1,299
| Quote:
Originally Posted by Bryn Ralph Mr. Scrapinpeg:
I do believe that you are unaware that the mere suggestion of an explosive device (as you described) is inappropriate for this thread. The federal authorities of the USA take umbrage to such advice. And the potential liability factor should be sufficient to discourage such practice/advice. | Very well:
MANDATORY DISCLAIMER: DO NOT ATTEMPT ANY OF THE SUGGESTIONS ONE READS IN THIS THREAD. ALL SUGGESTIONS HEREIN ARE PROPOSED BY THEIR AUTHORS FOR HUMOROUS REASONS ONLY. ANYONE WHO ATTEMPTS SOMETHING THEY READ IN THIS THREAD AND CAUSES INJURY TO THEMSELVES, TO OTHERS, AND/OR TO PROPERTY HAS ONLY THEIRSELF TO BLAME AS A WOEFUL FOOL, AND SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED IN PUBLIC PLACES UNESCORTED, SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED NEAR SHARP IMPLEMENTS, SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED TO OPERATE MACHINERY, AND SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED WITHIN THREE MILES OF A FENCING SALLE.
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Freedom of speech makes it easier to spot the idiots.
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06-11-2007, 05:35 PM
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#7 | | Senior Member
Join Date: May 2007 Location: Houston
Posts: 566
| Quote:
Originally Posted by scrapinpeg ...A WOEFUL FOOL... | This made me giggle =D |
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06-12-2007, 06:17 AM
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#8 | | Curmudgeon-in-Chief
Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Somewhere in your nightmares!
Posts: 23,538
| Waffles? Did someone mention waffles?
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Use the Shift key, people! Keyboard manufacturers everywhere are ineffably saddened when you ignore what they made just for you!
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06-12-2007, 07:50 PM
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#9 | | Boom!
Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Canada
Posts: 5,925
| Okay, here's what you can do:
Keep the cards in the deck. Drill a hole through the center of the deck, then put your finger through the hole. Poke your arch nemesis in the eye.
Or...
Hide a deck of cards in a hamburger. If swallowed whole, I bet a deck of cards would cause you some grief.
__________________ Pound for pound, the amoeba is the most vicious animal on earth. |
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06-12-2007, 10:36 PM
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#10 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 823
| Imbue individual cards with kinetic energy, throw them at foes, and watch them explode. Duh. Works best with a sexy Cajun accent. |
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06-12-2007, 10:58 PM
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#11 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Cougar Country
Posts: 8,916
| I would whip out my emery board and file all four edges of all 52 cards (plus the two jokers) so they are razor sharp.... thus becoming painful weapons allowing the victims to die slowly from paper cuts!!!.... mawahhhhaaaa!  |
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06-13-2007, 08:01 PM
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#12 | | Senior Member
Join Date: May 2007 Location: Houston
Posts: 566
| Quote:
Originally Posted by Fencergrl I would whip out my emery board and file all four edges of all 52 cards (plus the two jokers) so they are razor sharp.... thus becoming painful weapons allowing the victims to die slowly from paper cuts!!!.... mawahhhhaaaa!  | Truly, a horrible death.
I thought of two more:
Attach two packs of cards together with string. Behold, for you have created Card-Chucks.
Take two cards, and pre fight put glue on them. Then while fighting, slap both of them on your foe's eyes. Depending on the glue strength, he may be blind now! Attack quickly, by paper cutting them to death! |
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03-07-2008, 10:55 PM
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#13 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: In my house, DUH
Posts: 173
| Here are a couple:
1) Throw the cards shuriken style to embed them in your opponent! (These aren't usually lethal, but they are good, painful distractions.
2) Same as #1, but in this scenario, light all the cards on fire.
3) (WARNING: BUYING ENOUGH CARDS TO DO THIS MAY CLEAN OUT YOUR COLLEGE FUND) Make a card fortress (at least two or three stories high). If done correctly, this fort should be harder to collapse than reinforced steel. For addition safety, attach card rocket launchers and create a card moat around it with card sharks in it.
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Last edited by Little Bit; 03-07-2008 at 10:58 PM.
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03-11-2008, 01:52 AM
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#14 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: At work, lurking the fnet forums
Posts: 173
| Number three was all really just so you could use the card shark pun, wasn't it?
You could probably cut and fold the cards to make caltrops and puncture the feet of your pursuers. As long as the pursuers are all barefoot. So, like if you were being chased at the beach. Maybe.
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My fencing philosophy = quantity over quality. Eliminate the rest periods! Fence all three weapons! 15 touches for Vet DE's!
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04-16-2008, 03:46 AM
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#15 | | Senior Member
Join Date: May 2005 Location: San Francisco, CA
Posts: 9,348
| Wait, how did I miss this thread before? |
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