How many different ways can YOU think of?

[Mr BadGuy]

How many different ways can you think of to turn a pack of playing cards into a weapon? I'll start it off with just two.

Throwing a card at someone's face (obvious).

Spraying the cards at their face in order to escape (ala Caltrops.)

This sounded like a good idea at the time.

[Lord Gorlock]

Throw the entire deck (still in the box) at someones face. It'd hurt...I guess.

Fan them out, and use them like the chinese fan weapon thing!


I'm so awesome it hurts!

[scrapinpeg]

Get an old deck of cards from before the 1950s. The paper and ink they used to use are crucial for this to work.

Get a short length of lead pipe, threaded at both ends.

Shred the entire deck of cards into confetti-sized pieces.

Mix the shredded cards with ordinary room-temperature (not hot!) tap water, gently mixing until it gets a paste-like consistency.

Fill the lead pipe with your paste in a room-temperature or cooler room.

Securely cap both ends with lead pipe caps. Use extra-strong thread lock (a special glue found in most auto supply stores, bonds nuts and bolts in the absence of oxygen) to make a tight seal.

Your playing-card pipe bomb will explode with violent force and lethal shrapnel when heated. So don't try this at home, kids.


Now I have to ask, why do you want to know? [And caltrops are spikes used to puncture pursuing feet/tires, not really something sprayed at a pursuer's face.]

[Bryn Ralph]

Mr. Scrapinpeg:

I do believe that you are unaware that the mere suggestion of an explosive device (as you described) is inappropriate for this thread. The federal authorities of the USA take umbrage to such advice. And the potential liability factor should be sufficient to discourage such practice/advice.

[Mr BadGuy]

It was supposed to be a game of ridiculous creative suggestions originally. The caltrop reference was more in a "throw and escape" type of suggestion rather than their literal physical appearance. I guess I expected it to be more silly than serious. I have no intention of using cards for weapons; I'm fairly sure a bit of wood would prove far more deadly (street fencing fo life). Your suggestion, however, scares me.

I thought of another one. Many of you have seen the Magician who drops his cards, only to reveal they all stick together end to end. Now, imagine using this as a bullwhip-esque weapon! Much more, set it aflame, and yes. A flaming whip.

[scrapinpeg]

Mr. Scrapinpeg:

I do believe that you are unaware that the mere suggestion of an explosive device (as you described) is inappropriate for this thread. The federal authorities of the USA take umbrage to such advice. And the potential liability factor should be sufficient to discourage such practice/advice.

Very well:

MANDATORY DISCLAIMER: DO NOT ATTEMPT ANY OF THE SUGGESTIONS ONE READS IN THIS THREAD. ALL SUGGESTIONS HEREIN ARE PROPOSED BY THEIR AUTHORS FOR HUMOROUS REASONS ONLY. ANYONE WHO ATTEMPTS SOMETHING THEY READ IN THIS THREAD AND CAUSES INJURY TO THEMSELVES, TO OTHERS, AND/OR TO PROPERTY HAS ONLY THEIRSELF TO BLAME AS A WOEFUL FOOL, AND SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED IN PUBLIC PLACES UNESCORTED, SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED NEAR SHARP IMPLEMENTS, SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED TO OPERATE MACHINERY, AND SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED WITHIN THREE MILES OF A FENCING SALLE.

[Lord Gorlock]

...A WOEFUL FOOL...

This made me giggle =D

[Inquartata]

Waffles? Did someone mention waffles?

[ThatReallyHurt]

Okay, here's what you can do:

Keep the cards in the deck. Drill a hole through the center of the deck, then put your finger through the hole. Poke your arch nemesis in the eye.

Or...

Hide a deck of cards in a hamburger. If swallowed whole, I bet a deck of cards would cause you some grief.

[qatet]

Imbue individual cards with kinetic energy, throw them at foes, and watch them explode. Duh. Works best with a sexy Cajun accent.

[Fencergrl]

I would whip out my emery board and file all four edges of all 52 cards (plus the two jokers) so they are razor sharp.... thus becoming painful weapons allowing the victims to die slowly from paper cuts!!!.... mawahhhhaaaa!

[Lord Gorlock]

I would whip out my emery board and file all four edges of all 52 cards (plus the two jokers) so they are razor sharp.... thus becoming painful weapons allowing the victims to die slowly from paper cuts!!!.... mawahhhhaaaa!

Truly, a horrible death.

I thought of two more:

Attach two packs of cards together with string. Behold, for you have created Card-Chucks.

Take two cards, and pre fight put glue on them. Then while fighting, slap both of them on your foe's eyes. Depending on the glue strength, he may be blind now! Attack quickly, by paper cutting them to death!

[Little Bit]

Here are a couple:
1) Throw the cards shuriken style to embed them in your opponent! (These aren't usually lethal, but they are good, painful distractions.

2) Same as #1, but in this scenario, light all the cards on fire.

3) (WARNING: BUYING ENOUGH CARDS TO DO THIS MAY CLEAN OUT YOUR COLLEGE FUND) Make a card fortress (at least two or three stories high). If done correctly, this fort should be harder to collapse than reinforced steel. For addition safety, attach card rocket launchers and create a card moat around it with card sharks in it.

[RkfdFencer]

Number three was all really just so you could use the card shark pun, wasn't it?

You could probably cut and fold the cards to make caltrops and puncture the feet of your pursuers. As long as the pursuers are all barefoot. So, like if you were being chased at the beach. Maybe.

[SFfencer]

Wait, how did I miss this thread before?