Degree of Commitment

[Mo]

Been thinking about the thread that was hijacked basically into a home education thread and then after some thought, realized the thread is really about what it takes to make a world class fencer.
The European and Asian countries all have state sponsored schools where the kids are both "educated" and taught their sport.
Here we have to take out a second mortgage on the house to pay expenses when the kids get to the point where they are achieving world rankings and success.
For me, home education makes sense, but it doesn't come without some cost. Add this on to the money necessary to be on a team, travel, have lessons (cha ching!) and a family can be faced with some serious financial hardship.
The real issue is, how far are you willing to go to for the kid to be the absolute best they can be?
How far is the kid willing to go?
How hard will they work?
What is their potential?
Do you have a coach in the area who can teach your fencer what they need to know for success?
What about fencing partners?
Are there some excellent fencers in your area who will be around when your fencer needs to be training with them?

My in laws paid for my daughter's traveling the first 2.5 years. There was no way we could have afforded her schedule. My mother in law said it was worth it because she knew how hard my daughter worked.

Things worked out well for us. Our entire family was ready to relocate and we wanted some place nice. We found a good place to live and a good place for my kiddo to train.

The fencing has taken a toll on our family life though. We used to camp, raft and have "vacations." Now everyone is either working or going to fencing competitions. We are all off in different directions.

It seems to me, to have a high level, but young fencer in the family requires a lot from everyone. It is a commitment. The big question is how much of a commitment are you willing to make for your fencer and then how much veiled criticism and grumbling about advantages your can let roll off your back. It can get pretty ugly at times. I still can't decide if it is worth it but it certainly is to my fencer.

The Momster

[4qtrs]

Originally Posted by Mo

The European and Asian countries all have state sponsored schools where the kids are both "educated" and taught their sport.
Here we have to take out a second mortgage on the house to pay expenses when the kids get to the point where they are achieving world rankings and success.

I know that US skiing has this type of facility, but do other US sports have something simular?

It makes you wonder how many kids are missing out because their families can't make the level of commitment that it takes.

Originally Posted by Mo

The fencing has taken a toll on our family life though. We used to camp, raft and have "vacations." Now everyone is either working or going to fencing competitions. We are all off in different directions.

Yeah, I remember those vacations too. Now I can't even keep the citys straight, all the convention centers look the same.

[sleepyweasle]

This year we took our first non-fencing vacation in 2 years (remember - my kid has only been fencing for 3 years!) - and it was to visit our older child who is spending a semester abroad in Scotland (which I must say we could only afford because we got free airline tickets from frequent flier miles accrued from our younger daughter's fencing comps!)

Both my husband and I work full time to afford my kid's fencing club dues and lessons/coach's lessons (not to mention our morgage and the older kid's college fees). We try to accompany her to comps as much as possible (at least one of us has gone to all foreign comps) but more and more frequently we are sending her alone to room with a clubmate. She is using money from her sweet 16 to pay for equipment. We'll end up paying for a couple of fencing camps this summer I'm sure.

We were kinda hoping fencing would lead to a college scholarshop but, naturally, she seems to want to go to a school that does NOT give sports scholarships. But she has a year to change her mind and hope springs eternal...

we certainly could not afford to relocate and no one in our family would be willing to contribute any more than the sweet 16 gifts they gave for her fencing career. And oddly, the 156$ she got as a "high performance award" didn't do too much to offset the cost of her international fencing season.

Luckily she is a train ride away from one of the finest fencing clubs in the US - and SHE has been willing to sacrifice (in time and effort) as much as we have to sacrifice monetarily for her fencing. And she loves it. which makes it all worthwhile...

Although I have to say she was VERY ENVIOUS of the Russian girls (who attend "sport high school).

[OMCEPKEN]

If it's worth it to your fencer, you should consider it worthwhile.

[journalmom]

This thread made me chuckle. I thought we were the only ones thinking "Why are we fencing?"; the operative word, "we" , although only the kid(s) are fencing. We have two fencers in our family and we ponder this question every day...more on days when I have to use my credit card or checks for things related to fencing.

My fencers, who've been fencing for a little over two years, have been quasi-serious, as in, I think they should be jump-roping, doing sit-ups, push-ups, pull-ups and target and footwork without my prompting on a daily basis but, they don't. They barely make their twice a week privates and two group lessons...due to their rigorous school work. My son has no social life (he is only fourteen but still...) My daughter rarely has playdates on weekends with her non-fencing friends.

We, as a family, barely have time to do anything else other than go to local tournaments on weekends and NAC's on long holiday weekends. The grandparents on both sides are tugging and hinting that we don't see them often enough. Our family, not just the kids, have fencing families as friends. The rooms in the house have remnants of weapons parts, magazines, books, and journals all related to fencing. The DVD collection now includes World Chmapionship Fencing Tournaments. The video camera is full of tournament clips of our fencers' "agonies of defeat." And the computer is full of pictures of our fencers, indistinguishable from the next fencer since all of them look the same in the frontal vew, doing something that kinda resemble an acrobatic act. And inordinate sum of money equalling GNP of some Third World country have been spent on fencing and I'm absolutely certain that no scholarship on earth will match that. Heck, I even invested more money (that I don't have since we have to pay for lessons) to publish "The Fencing Journal" so that they can track their progress and may be help other disorganized fencers like mine.

However, having said all that, my kids will never quit fencing? No.(maybe if they are critically injured and can't hold their weapons.) Are they ever going to become world champions? Probably not. Will I ask them to quit because of all the sacrifices we, as a family, are making? No. Do I feel proud that they are so committed to something that I never had the opportunity to when I was growing up? Oh hell, yes. Am I looking towards fencing to help them get into college? Initially, no. Now? definitely "NO" since I don't think they'll have the time to fence in college, therefore, a scholarship is not the goal.

As far as I'm concerned, as long as they are willing to schlep the bloody bag on and off the SUV (the trunk is too high for me to take them on and off the truck) in the rain, snow, sleet, or when it is a great weather outside to play catch, I'll shut up and smile whenever they want to go to the club to fence.

[4qtrs]

Originally Posted by journalmom

The rooms in the house have remnants of weapons parts, magazines, books, and journals all related to fencing. The DVD collection now includes World Chmapionship Fencing Tournaments. The video camera is full of tournament clips of our fencers' "agonies of defeat." And the computer is full of pictures of our fencers, indistinguishable from the next fencer since all of them look the same in the frontal vew, doing something that kinda resemble an acrobatic act. And inordinate sum of money equalling GNP of some Third World country have been spent of fencing and I'm absolutely certain that no scholarship on earth will match that.

I am so thankful that others live like I do!

by the way JournalMom, I saw your journal the other day at the SYC in Pasadena. Nice work!! I may have to pick one up at the next NAC!

[journalmom]

No, you are not alone and thanks! The journal came about because there were score sheets and journal entries flying everywhere in the house and it was my attempt to "organize" everything into a nice little book. Well, now I have blue books strewn about everywhere. Can't win.

[D'Artag-NOT]

I'm single and childless--sort of an outsider looking in--but has anyone run into conflicts with the needs of the fencer's non-fencing siblings? What if you've got one serious fencer and one serious drama student, say?

[pacer]

My two kids interests ran serially for the most part. My older one was into music and we schlepped her cello everywhere. when it was time to go from "beginner" to a more advanced (college) cello, we travelled to different violinmakers to find one that fit. As she went off to college, she decided against majoring in music - alas no scholarship. By the time my younger one started fencing, my daughter was driving herself to lessons, concerts, etc., so it was a relatively seamless shift from music lessons to fencing lessons. The big change was less practice time at home and more at the club.

My son won't be an elite fencer, but a very good one. I expect it will be something he'll enjoy as long as he can. It won't lead to a scholarship, but he is only looking at colleges with either a club on campus or nearby.

As for the rest of the family - we set up for concerts, handed out refreshments and served on the local youth symphony board. Now we score keep, serve on bout committee and the local division board. It's just what we do for our kids.

Whenever we had conflicts between a concert or a tournament - it was divide and conquer. (p.s. they were both serious theater techies.) WHat did happen was that my son went to every recital and concert of his sister's and she has yet to see him compete.