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  1. #1
    Member Array MessiahFencing's Avatar
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    The 'You Know You Fence Too Much When..' Thread

    Every board i check out has something like it. Ever relate something 100% non-fencing to fencing? For me, I've thought of:

    You know you fence to much when you contemplate spring track events as '1.5 strips, 4 strips etc'

    You know you fence too much when you get a new shiny toaster, and think, hey, that'd make a nice blade!

    You know you fence too much when your pet has holes in it and flick marks on its wrist / shoulder.

    You know you fence too much when you watch the history channel, see a medeival sword fight, and think you could do better than the actors.

    You know you fence too much when you sleep with your fencing bag...(HEY! it makes a good pillow.....)

    You know you fence to much when you start this thread ( yes i know its coming )
    Ich will dass ihr mir vertraut
    Ich will dass ihr mir glaubt
    Ich will in Beifall untergehen
    Ich will jeden Herzschlag kontrollieren

  2. #2
    Senior Member Array UnorthodoxEpeeist's Avatar
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    You know you fence too much when you start advancing and retreating on the sidewalk instead of walking normally.
    No one cares how long your epee is, and if it breaks you just get a new one.

  3. #3
    Senior Member Array Coldfire's Avatar
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    You know you fence to much when your friends ask you to go hang out and you say "Sorry I can't because I've got a competition. "

    I definately read that somewhere on the forums before but it was the best one that came to mind.
    Citius, Altius, Fortius

  4. #4
    Senior Member Array Beloit Fencer of Old's Avatar
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    You know you fence too much when, even though you SUCK, you can put a name to a face for every fencer in the nearest six divisions.

    You know you fence too much when can recognize any fencer on the other side of an NAC based on the shape of their uniform.

    You know you fence too much when you start gluing three black stripes on the sides of your dress shoes at work.

    You know you fence too much when...wow...I can't quite see what that road sign says up ahead...wait, let me put this thick, black wire mesh in front of my eyes...*Oh!* "Exit three miles!"
    VERMONT OUT OF U.S..
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  5. #5
    Senior Member Array SSMSabreMN's Avatar
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    You know you fence too much when, while standing around talking to someone, you notice you've come en garde.

    --It's been said before, but I'm noticing it in myself now more than ever...
    Notes from a girl.

    Alt + F4 : I Dare You

  6. #6
    Senior Member Array Rick Shellhouse's Avatar
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    You know you fence to much when...

    You actually read and giggle at threads like this...




    Rick

  7. #7
    Senior Member Array larkmaj's Avatar
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    You no longer have left and right legs, but front and back.

  8. #8
    Posting Hound Array Go? Fencing?'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by larkmaj View Post
    You no longer have left and right legs, but front and back.
    You get confused which leg you're talking about because you fence ambidextrously.
    "There's no such thing as a free lunge." -Cadorette
    Go? Fencing? Fencing Accessories & T-Shirts
    Kethrim.com Kethrim.blogspot.com

  9. #9
    Senior Member Array UnorthodoxEpeeist's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SSMSabreMN View Post
    You know you fence too much when, while standing around talking to someone, you notice you've come en garde.

    --It's been said before, but I'm noticing it in myself now more than ever...
    I definitely have to relate to that.
    No one cares how long your epee is, and if it breaks you just get a new one.

  10. #10
    Senior Member Array ParryRiposte's Avatar
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    You know you fence too much that when playing billiards you assume an en garde-like stance.

    You know you fence too much when you yell "et la!" in a fist fight.

    You know you fence to much when you realise that the only reason you have a job is to support your fencing.

  11. #11
    Senior Member Array OROD's Avatar
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    You know you fence too much when your plan to get through heavy traffic envolves fencing tactics... I'll feint right, and then when they move to block me I'll disengage left and accelerate!

    .
    .
    "I've been ionized, but I'm okay now." - Buckaroo Banzai
    .

  12. #12
    Senior Member Array OROD's Avatar
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    You know you fence too much when someone goes to shake your hand and you parry them with yours.

    .
    .
    "I've been ionized, but I'm okay now." - Buckaroo Banzai
    .

  13. #13
    Senior Member Array chiiluver's Avatar
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    You know you fence too much when you signed up here.

    You know you fence too much if LP makes you feel full of warm and fluffy feelings (WAFF).

    You know you fence too much when you pick up any cylindrical object and start using it like a grip for no reason.

    You know you *beeep* fence too much if you *beeep* start hearing things like *beeep* everywhere and start looking *beeep* to see if it was your touch.
    "Someday someone will hold a meet at which there are absolutely no problems with any of the electrical equipment. I suspect that the news of this event will be buried back on page eleven of the newspapers, however, with the first ten pages taken by the news that Hell has frozen over." -Rudy Volkman

  14. #14
    Senior Member Array SSMSabreMN's Avatar
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    You know you fence too much when, upon being asked if tournaments cut into your social life, you reply rather confused "Tournaments ARE my social life!"

    Notes from a girl.

    Alt + F4 : I Dare You

  15. #15
    Senior Member Array Coldfire's Avatar
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    You know you fence too much when you DON'T look at the (traffic) lights because your coach yells at you for it.
    Citius, Altius, Fortius

  16. #16
    Senior Member Array Beloit Fencer of Old's Avatar
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    You know you fence too much when you don't have a stroller for your children...you haul them around in a "wheelie bag."

    You know you fence too much when ONE of your dress shoes has strange scuff marks on the big-toe side...hmmmm....

    You know you fence too much when, in your house, wrapping-paper tubes NEVER make it into the trash in one piece.

    You know you fence too much when, picking up your friend at the airport, he asks you to "pop the trunk," and you look at him askance. "You mean, the Fencing Equipment Storage Area? That's full!"
    VERMONT OUT OF U.S..
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    This Space For Rent

  17. #17
    Senior Member Array UnorthodoxEpeeist's Avatar
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    You know you fence too much when you realize you have no NON-fencing friends.

    You know you fence too much when you realize you're sitting in front of your computer thinking about what makes you or other people fence too much...

    I think this post should go into the Game Threads section.

    No one cares how long your epee is, and if it breaks you just get a new one.

  18. #18
    Senior Member Array parrythis's Avatar
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    You know you fence too much when your girlfriend gets you physically aroused and you respond by saying in an Austin Powers voice, "En Guarde, baby!"
    One test is worth a thousand opinions.
    I ain't as good as I once was, but I'm as good once as I ever was. - Toby Keith
    Living life without taking the occasional risk is like lemon-pepper chicken without the lemon-peper. It's just chicken.

  19. #19
    Senior Member Array Sabresque's Avatar
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    When all your dreams are set at fencing tournaments or the gym
    -Sabresque

    "Those whippernsapper Be-Bop Bohemians!"

  20. #20
    Senior Member Array chiiluver's Avatar
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    You know you fence too much when you get road rage because of somebody took your right of way.
    "Someday someone will hold a meet at which there are absolutely no problems with any of the electrical equipment. I suspect that the news of this event will be buried back on page eleven of the newspapers, however, with the first ten pages taken by the news that Hell has frozen over." -Rudy Volkman

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