The 'You Know You Fence Too Much When..' Thread

[fences_like_a_lemur]

You know you fence too much when you start wondering how well you could fence in a tuxedo, or how well a fencing outfit would work at prom.

[ParryRiposte]

You know you fence too much when you start wondering how well you could fence in a tuxedo, or how well a fencing outfit would work at prom.

You don't deserve to say that, non-fencer.

[Go? Fencing?]

You know you fence too much when you start wondering how well you could fence in a tuxedo, or how well a fencing outfit would work at prom.

You know that you fence too much when you take another fencer to prom, and finger-fence while he's in a tux and you're in a prom dress and high heels (I lost, not because of the high heels, but because the dress wouldn't let me lunge).

[Aussie_Fencer]

YKYFTMW... you fence people with umbrellas in class, and then the teacher yells at you for hitting the other student and you say that it is okay because it was off target and you didn't score.

[fences_like_a_lemur]

You know you fence too much when while having a fire you start fencing the flames with the stick and when the stick catches fire you start doing fencing moves with your 'sword' to watch the glowy flame.

You know you fence too much when you start fencing yourself with two sticks that have marshmallows of them while trying to toast them.

[ParryRiposte]

You know you fence too much when you haven't been to the club in two weeks and you get so sad that they have to put you on anti-depressants.

[amyoftherealm]

YKYFTMW...

-you and your fencing buddies are getting ready for a Halloween party and can't decide between being pirates and being the three muskateers
-you're at a party with glow sticks and your non-fencing friends start having a lightsaber duel...and won't let you play
-your brother starts poking you during dinner, you shout, "off-target," and then you feint-disengage around his arm and stab him with a piece of bread
-your college roommate is a fencer, and the roommate of one of your best friends (also a fencer) is a fencer
-all of your favorite movies involve sword-fighting in some capacity or another

[fences_like_a_lemur]

You know you fence too much when while at lunch with friends at a Chinese restaurant, they start challenging you to duels with chop sticks.

You know you fence too much when the first thought that goes through your head when you put on tux is: This would make a sweet fencing jacket! And then the second thought it: **** I make this tux look great!

[SSMSabreMN]

YKYFTMW:

While planning out your skit for history you convince your group the fight between the main characters MUST be a duel and you MUST use sabres. Then while working out the details of the choreography that night they get mad at you for completely critiquing it and make comments such as "We dont need to learn how to fence" to which you reply "You've got to be kidding, right?"

Oh how I love group projects....

[The Chaotic Wind]

YKYFTM when the poser fencer at your school challenges you to a finger fencing mathc and you slap him across the face reptitively saying "flat" befopre punching him in the gut...
Yeah even if he wasn't a poser i'd still wanna beat him to death with his arm..or something.

[remistress]

YKYFTM when after you have had a meeting with a fencer and a non-fencer, and observe the fencer being too aggressive throughout the meeting, the only advice that comes to mind after the meeting is, "Less foil, more epee."

[Zasha]

YKYFTMW

you become incredibly depressed during exams, not because they're particular stressful, but because the time crunch means less fencing.

when you try to time your check-out so you can squeeze in one more practice, but can't because you have to be out within 24 hours of your last exam.

when you keep on thinking of awful things to do to your RA for enforcing that rule.

[Asprin]

YKYFTMW

you decide to compete the day before you fly out on holiday and your flying out early in the morning.

[The Chaotic Wind]

YKYFTM when AP tests are around the corner and instea dof preparing you go to fencing nd when you get home feel guilty. Nopt because you didn;t stuy, but because you know you could've got that timing on the disengage better and hit on target.

[sneakattack]

YKYFTM When entering an intersection, instead of acknowledging the other car's right of way, you try to parry them with your car, and when they swerve around you, you yell, "nice disengage!"

[sneakattack]

oooh, I just thought of some more.....

YKYFTMW:

Your boss greets you at work by going into the fencing stance you taught him and when he waves his arm around, and you correct him by saying, "no, it's all in the wrist not the whole arm."

You get back from Vegas, and when your coworker asks if you gambled you look at him like he's crazy because you can't afford to throw away your equipment money, and who has time to gamble when you're in a tournament? But what you actually say is, "No but look at this awesome bruise I got!" It's so huge, colorful, and impressive that your coworker, who is a soccer player, immediately tries to find something worse on his body and fails miserably.

You answer your cell phone and your friend asks where you are, and you respond for at least the 10th time that you're at the fencing club, and they ask, "Do you live there now?" And you respond that, yes, you should probably stop paying for rent at your "other" apartment.

Your parents don't even bother to ask you what you want for your birthday or xmas anymore, they just automatically send you a gift certificate for fencing equipment.

[Josephine25]

You Know You Fence Too Much When You Know All Your Refs By Name

[Aussie_Fencer]

when you start fencing in the back of a history class room with highlighters.

[Zasha]

when you automatically read "prime" as in "prime number" out loud as "preem" aka parry one.

[fancy for fencing]

[QUOTE=sneakattack;563144]
You get back from Vegas, and when your coworker asks if you gambled you look at him like he's crazy because you can't afford to throw away your equipment money, and who has time to gamble when you're in a tournament? But what you actually say is, "No but look at this awesome bruise I got!" It's so huge, colorful, and impressive that your coworker, who is a soccer player, immediately tries to find something worse on his body and fails miserably.


YKYFTM when you can't shock your coworkers with your bruises anymore.

...when you are in a bookstore and the first thing you do is to look whether they've got books about fencing.

You know you are reading too much about fencing results in the internet when you see a sign with the inscription "WC" and you think "World Cup???".