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Thread: The 516,649 post thread

  1. 03-26-2007 05:38 PM #421
    the maple epee
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    *Brings bottle of Yellowtail* Good thing I have my handy dandy Spanish
    translator!

    Argentinian: Donde Estoy?!?

    Maple: He's saying "Where am I"?
    Mess with my cows and I'll break your knees
    U.S. OUT OF VERMONT
    More Cowbell
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  2. 03-26-2007 05:39 PM #422
    ParryRiposte
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    Oh, thanks maple! *pours a few glasses*

    What? He wants me to taze people? Okay! *runs around tazing people*
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  3. 03-26-2007 05:41 PM #423
    SFfencer
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    *SF is out cold*
    Andre Moreau: I fall in love constantly, indiscriminately! The effect is the same as if I never fell in love at all.
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  4. 03-26-2007 05:45 PM #424
    ParryRiposte
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    Haha! *tazes him more and laughs like a ditz*
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  5. 03-26-2007 06:25 PM #425
    the maple epee
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    *Pulls out beer bong*
    We better keep this away from PR!
    Mess with my cows and I'll break your knees
    U.S. OUT OF VERMONT
    More Cowbell
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  6. 03-26-2007 06:27 PM #426
    ParryRiposte
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    Bong! Weed! Beer meets weed! Gimme! *tazes self* oww! Stoppit!
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  7. 03-26-2007 07:48 PM #427
    the maple epee
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    *Maple takes tazer from PR* PR, Why don't you just sit down and take it easy for a minute. We don't want you to hurt yourself, right?
    *Argentinian grabs tazer from Maple, holds it the wrong way round and pulls the trigger, accidently tazering himself* *everybody stares in stunned silence and then they burst out laughing* Pour me some more Yellowtail, PR. That was funny! Ooh boy, I'm glad he didn't get a hold of the cattle prod! Yaaay!
    Who wants a cattle prod? I've got enough for everybody! *Starts prodding people*
    Mess with my cows and I'll break your knees
    U.S. OUT OF VERMONT
    More Cowbell
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  8. 03-26-2007 07:57 PM #428
    ParryRiposte
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    *grabs maple and pours wine down his throat* There you go! Cattle prod? Yaay! Why do you have a cattle prod in a penthouse. Let alone more than one...

    Did I ever tell you the story about the gun/tazer mixup?
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  9. 03-26-2007 11:26 PM #429
    SFfencer
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    Quote Originally Posted by ParryRiposte View Post
    Did I ever tell you the story about the gun/tazer mixup?
    No you didn't, please tell us.
    *SF gets himself a plate of spanikopita*
    Andre Moreau: I fall in love constantly, indiscriminately! The effect is the same as if I never fell in love at all.
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  10. 03-26-2007 11:27 PM #430
    the maple epee
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    No, tell me some time!

    *Pokes SF with cattle prod*

    Hee hee hee! He's still out! *Pours wine on SF*

    *Pokes things with cattle prod*

    Whoo! Hee hee.
    Mess with my cows and I'll break your knees
    U.S. OUT OF VERMONT
    More Cowbell
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  11. 03-26-2007 11:28 PM #431
    Rabid Monk
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    Look!
    My internet works again!

    And I bet you all thought you were safe....
    The preceding post brought to you by Rabid Monk (TM).
    Rabid Monk: informative, irreverent, interesting, random and downright odd posts, done with pride since 1983.
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  12. 03-26-2007 11:37 PM #432
    ParryRiposte
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    *tackles maple to the floor* Sit down! Stop being pseudo-drunk! Okay, the tazer story...

    So a friend of mine is a cop, right? One day she's on call; dispatch calls up and they tell her that there's a guy in the park who's run up a tree and refuses to get down. He was retarded or something, I guess. So she leaves to go deal with this guy. Anyway, she arrives at the park, there's people everywhere, and she's trying to talk him into getting down. He's carrying on and totally not listening. It gets to the point when she decides that the only way to get him down is to tranquilize him, i.e. taze him. Now, a tazer and a handgun have exactly the same feel and the same weight; the only way they can tell them apart is that they have a designated side for each. But she, of course, had them mixed up. She pulls out her gun and shoots the guy. She was fired the next day. Hah.
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  13. 03-26-2007 11:59 PM #433
    the maple epee
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    Dude! That's awful and hilarious at the same time!

    Now, back to being pseudo drunk.

    *Dresses unconscious Argentinian in Santa costume*

    Hahahaha! Whooooo!
    Mess with my cows and I'll break your knees
    U.S. OUT OF VERMONT
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  14. 03-27-2007 12:02 AM #434
    ParryRiposte
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    Isn't it though! Now that I think about it, you bear a strong resemblance to that guy...

    Oh, psuedo-drunk. Right.

    Oh, my, God. Did you see that? The big shiny guy in the middle of the living room just told me that I'm a superhero! Watch what I can do - I can break the coffee table in half with my forehead! *bangs head on table*
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  15. 03-27-2007 02:14 AM #435
    SFfencer
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    *The Argentinian dressed as Santa start shooting up the penthouse with a machine gun*

    (Hey have you ever noticed, Santa uses the same letters as Satan)
    Andre Moreau: I fall in love constantly, indiscriminately! The effect is the same as if I never fell in love at all.
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  16. 03-27-2007 07:53 AM #436
    the maple epee
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    *Takes machine gun from Argentinian, throws it out window*

    Hey! Didja hear about the dyslexic guy who sold his soul to santa?
    Mess with my cows and I'll break your knees
    U.S. OUT OF VERMONT
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  17. 03-27-2007 06:35 PM #437
    ParryRiposte
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    No... do tell! Did he sell his soul?

    Hey! That was mine! *dives out window to retrieve rifle*
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  18. 03-27-2007 07:14 PM #438
    the maple epee
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    *Leaps out of window, grabs PR in mid air and opens parachute*

    *Gives PR rifle and jet packs her back up to penthouse*

    How heroic was that!?!

    Ice cream anybody? Ive got every flavor of Ben & Jerry's!
    Mess with my cows and I'll break your knees
    U.S. OUT OF VERMONT
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  19. 03-27-2007 07:17 PM #439
    ParryRiposte
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    *gasps* Oh! I am so offended by your so called "heroics," maple! You think that I can't take care of myself? I had everything totally planned out. But no, you had to save the day yet again. Thanks for nothing! *races to a back room to stew in egotistical irritation*
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  20. 03-27-2007 08:20 PM #440
    the maple epee
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    Oh jeez...

    *Rushes after PR*
    PR? I'm sorry PR, I thought you were falling.
    *Gives PR ice cream*
    Will you come back and have fun with the rest of us?
    Whaddya say?

    Mess with my cows and I'll break your knees
    U.S. OUT OF VERMONT
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