10 ways to tell your fencing someone better then you.

[FineLame]

> He has signed the score sheet before the bout started.

> As he arrived, someone asked him to sign a photo "for his mummy".

> He has watched your last bout and changed his epee to adjust his grip, his tips and his strip to your "style".

> Your coach says "I'm sure he will realize you've progressed".

[Spanky]

> when s/he takes time to wave and blow kisses at attracive men/women in the crowd during the bout.

>after a desultory salute, they yawn.

> the opponet's coach has a stopwatch and guiness book of record officials along to watch the bout.

[three_hundred_fifty_five]

The letters RUS are on the back of his lame.

[135711]

When they're so frightened of you that they have to run around the salle and talk about you.

[Niceguy4186]

when his coach comes over to give you advice

[Fencing Angel]

> When you get beat 15-2 by another fencer, you get really pissed. then someone tells you that you just got 2 touches on a 5 time world champion. Congrats. (really happened)

> when your head coach comes out to give His student (on the other end of the strip) some more Vodka. and you still lose. (didn't happen)

> you watch the next bout that your room-mate (from france) fences, and he totally kicks butt wishing all the while you could have been half that good right now.

[JEC]

When the disciplinary commission of the FIE declares itself "incompetent" to suspend your opponent despite a positive doping test.

From <a href="http://www.lusa.pt/service.asp?service_id=Serviço%20Mundiais%20de%20E sgrima" target="_blank">portuguese news agency</a>

Esgrima: Mundiais - Francesa Flessel autorizada a competir apesar de doping

Lisboa, 17 Ago (Lusa) - A francesa Laura Flessel, dupla campeã olímpica de Atlanta96 e que acusou positivo por coramina glucose no torneio de equipas de Málaga (Espanha), foi autorizada a participar na modalidade individual de espada dos Mundiais de esgrima de Lisboa.

Rene Roch, presidente da Federação Internacional de Esgrima (FIE), anunciou hoje a decisão após a reunião da comissão de disciplina, que se declarou incompetente devido a um problema jurídico.

A bicampeã olímpica reconheceu sexta-feira ter aceite uma pastilha do quinesioterapeuta da equipa David Soulier, que reconheceu a ter prescrito por engano.

VR Lusa/fim

Babel Fish translation of the paragraph in bold:

"Rene Roch, president of the International Federacy of Brandishhes (IT WEAVES), announced the decision today after the meeting of the commission of disciplines, that imcompetent person due to a legal problem declared itself." (Sounds like Yoda <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="wink.gif" /> "