08-17-2006, 02:46 PM
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#81 | | Senior Member
Join Date: May 2006 Location: Here
Posts: 2,121
| Grope her breasts. Girls love that.
How do I get to leave work early today?
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Originally Posted by IHateMrPotatohead I can't think of anything to put down there! |  | 
|  | | And now for this message... |
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08-17-2006, 02:50 PM
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#82 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Savannah, Ga
Posts: 6,033
| Kill your boss, use a high caliber rifle that will penetrate whatever cubicle wall he sits behind, and then use your infrared scope to target him, and blammo! You will get to leave work early!
Should I save money for school or is there something else I should spend it on?
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The gpa requirement for UGA Pharmacy is based solely upon those classes they require. What that means for me is in the eyes of UGA Pharmacy- I have a 4.0. Yes that's right- I freaking rock!
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08-17-2006, 03:06 PM
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#83 | | Incorruptible
Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: NJ
Posts: 2,758
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Originally Posted by Black Jeebus Should I save money for school or is there something else I should spend it on? | DE_S_T, would you care to answer this one. 
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Fencing T-shirts available at Off-The-Piste Wear **New designs** including f.net themed designs for easy recognition of fellow f.netters at tournaments!
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08-17-2006, 03:14 PM
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#84 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 1,219
| what should i do to gtmac for not posting a question?
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I am but mad by north-north west. When the wind is southerly i know a hawk from a handsaw. -Hamlet
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08-17-2006, 03:22 PM
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#85 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Shenandoah Valley, VA
Posts: 380
| I would think that shutting off his flow of Rep might get his attention.... Wait - that's actual advice! 
Try setting loose 10,000 flies in his apartment/home/cardboardbox/dwelling. This ought to teach him a lesson.
How do I get rid of the annoying fly in my office?
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"A well-instructed people alone can be permanently a free people" -- James Madison
"Error of opinion may be tolerated where reason is left free to combat it" -- Thomas Jefferson | |
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08-17-2006, 03:39 PM
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#86 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Savannah, Ga
Posts: 6,033
| Have you tried chlorine gas? Just get gallons of bleach, and gallons of ammonia and mix them together. The key part to this is you have to make sure you do it yourself, with nothing hindering your own airflow. You have to make sure you inhale lots of the resultant gas to be sure you've got the right mix!
How can I acheive better living through chemistry?
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The gpa requirement for UGA Pharmacy is based solely upon those classes they require. What that means for me is in the eyes of UGA Pharmacy- I have a 4.0. Yes that's right- I freaking rock!
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08-17-2006, 04:04 PM
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#87 | | Epee fencing addict
Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Glenwood, ny
Posts: 2,209
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Originally Posted by Black Jeebus How can I acheive better living through chemistry? | Drugs!! Lots and lots of drugs! The harder the better. And alcohol. Preferably at the same time and in large quantities.
Now that she's divorceed from Charlie Sheen, how can I get Denise Richards to marry me, then divorce me and give me a huge cash settlement? (which I can use to finance my fencing)
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One test is worth a thousand opinions.
I ain't as good as I once was, but I'm as good once as I ever was. - Toby Keith
"We have met the enemy and he is us." - Pogo | 
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08-17-2006, 04:04 PM
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#88 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Tucson, AZ USA
Posts: 1,207
| According to Dr. Timothy Leary that is achieved by consuming lots of LSD!
How should I researh a new vehicle that I want to purchase?
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Fail until you succeed!
Ka-riposte back atcha Purple!
Disgruntled Employee of the Month.
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08-17-2006, 04:18 PM
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#89 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 2,078
| Go to the junkyard and ask the owner to yank a sh*tbox out from under the pile of burned-out tires and broken appliances. Get in the car and close the door. If the wheels/doors/anything don't fall off, congratulations, you got a new ride.
How can I fit all my clothes and apartment accessories into my car?
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"Bleeker's mom was possibly attractive once, but now she looks like a Hobbit. You know, the fat one, that was in the Goonies." -Juno MacGuff | |
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08-17-2006, 04:23 PM
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#90 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Shenandoah Valley, VA
Posts: 380
| Drive an old schoolbus. They get good gas mileage too.
How do I tell my wife that that dress does make her butt look big?
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"A well-instructed people alone can be permanently a free people" -- James Madison
"Error of opinion may be tolerated where reason is left free to combat it" -- Thomas Jefferson | |
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08-17-2006, 04:27 PM
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#91 | | the dark one
Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: MA/NH line
Posts: 3,818
| Don't beat around the bush, and don't even wait for her to ask. Just go right up and tell her, "Honey, that dress makes you look fat. Now, what's for dinner?" While you're at it, you might want to *also* mention that she's putting on a little weight. Chicks love honesty.
What's the best way for me to lose 10 pounds really fast?
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"Let's see... take responsibility for my own life, or blame YOU? Ding ding ding ding ding! Blame you wins hands-down!" - Bowler Hat Guy, Meet the Robinsons | |
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08-17-2006, 04:33 PM
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#92 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 2,078
| Cut off your head. 
What should I do with my friend Bill tonight?
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"Bleeker's mom was possibly attractive once, but now she looks like a Hobbit. You know, the fat one, that was in the Goonies." -Juno MacGuff | |
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08-17-2006, 04:34 PM
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#93 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Venice Beach, CA
Posts: 1,308
| Have him over for a romantic night alone.
What should I do with my friend who is being a jerk? She used to be my best friend, but now we barely ever even talk.
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"Life is like a wheel, where everyone steals, but when we rise, it's like Strawberry Fields."
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08-17-2006, 04:38 PM
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#94 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: ??FC ~)---------- San Francisco, CA
Posts: 2,270
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Originally Posted by seven6ty What should I do with my friend who is being a jerk? She used to be my best friend, but now we barely ever even talk. | Have her over for a romantic night alone.
Q: If I see a cute girl walking down the street, what's the best way to meet her?
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"I don't mind being the smartest man in the world. I just wish it wasn't this one." - Ozymandias
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08-17-2006, 04:43 PM
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#95 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Cougar Country
Posts: 8,788
| Girls love having someone who's a good listener. Have some business cards made up indicating you're a therapist. They also like someone who's cool and hip and doesn't conform. For fun capitalize a couple letters such as "TheRapist"... women will flock to you.
How do I prevent getting sunburned while laying in my canoe?
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Wedding guest comment on KL & SH's wedding: Quote: |
Originally Posted by BAKER/the/swd/grl lol this reminds me of the prison documentary I saw. ew. | Kinda glad it's invite only.  | |
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08-17-2006, 04:48 PM
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#96 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 2,078
| Duct-tape yourself to the gunwales of the craft, then have someone flip it over so it's bottom-up. You'll be shaded from the sun.
How should I pass the time these last few days before I go back to school?
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"Bleeker's mom was possibly attractive once, but now she looks like a Hobbit. You know, the fat one, that was in the Goonies." -Juno MacGuff | |
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08-17-2006, 05:01 PM
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#97 | | the dark one
Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: MA/NH line
Posts: 3,818
| Go on a 3-day bender and get uproariously lewd. Oh wait... that actually sounds like pretty good advice!
How about this...
Find all your notes from your courses last year, and study them. Buy the books for THIS year's classes early, and read the first 6 chapters of each.
How should I get my French pronunciation back to where it used to be?
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"Let's see... take responsibility for my own life, or blame YOU? Ding ding ding ding ding! Blame you wins hands-down!" - Bowler Hat Guy, Meet the Robinsons | |
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08-17-2006, 05:12 PM
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#98 | | Question Game Queen
Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Southern Canadia
Posts: 15,307
| Take a trip to French Canadia with G?F? and talk to all the drunks you see lying on the street. That'll teach you to slur- I mean, pronounce- just like Rene Roch.
How can I avoid visiting my grandmother? | |
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08-17-2006, 05:14 PM
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#99 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 1,326
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Originally Posted by Go? Fencing? How can I avoid visiting my grandmother? | Teach her to fence well and take her to a tourney to compete. When you face her in the finals, talk some serious trash -- make fun of her granny panties, for example, or compare her skills to *her* grandmother.
She won't want you to ever visit her again. Quote: |
Originally Posted by swordwench How should I get my French pronunciation back to where it used to be? | Stand up, shake your legs a little, and if that doesn't work, make sure no one's watching and just pull it out of where it's creeped. A misplaced pronunciation can be darned aggravating after a while, especially during a long car trip. Ouch!
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How does one poach an egg?
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"Why do you say this to me, when you know I will kill you for it?" - Zod
Last edited by Sciurus-Rex; 08-17-2006 at 05:17 PM.
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08-17-2006, 05:19 PM
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#100 | | Epee fencing addict
Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Glenwood, ny
Posts: 2,209
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Originally Posted by Sciurus-Rex How does one poach an egg? | My favorite question! Drive your car around for 15-20 minutes, preferably at high speed to get the engine nice and hot. Park the car, open the hood, and remove the radiator cap. PROMPTLY crack an egg and drop it in the radiator. This will not only poach your egg but also seal any leaks your radiator might have.
How do I convince my wife to let me date other women? (a possibly atrocious question in its own right!)
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One test is worth a thousand opinions.
I ain't as good as I once was, but I'm as good once as I ever was. - Toby Keith
"We have met the enemy and he is us." - Pogo | | | |
