07-26-2006, 11:24 AM
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#261 | | No, your mom's a lemur
Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: None of your Damn buisiness! Or California.
Posts: 2,832
| Because, like, juniors are way too young and stuffs. Cuz they're all like, "No, we can't have sex because I'm a minor," and I just tell them, "Don't worry, nobody will ever find out." And they're all like, "I have mace." And I'm all like, "Cool, I can stick the handle up your orifices," and then they're all "No. This kind of mace." And I'm all, "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH FOR THE LOVE OF GOD MY EYES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MY EYES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT???!!!!! IT BURNS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT BUUUUUUUUURUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRNNNNNNNSSSSS!!!!
But I've never tried 20 at once though. That's probably you're problem right there.
How come my entire "Porn or strip club" thread vanished? I mean, I've heard of locking a thread or blasting a post, but I've never heard of vaporizing a whole thread like that. No trace at all. It made me sad..... | 
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07-26-2006, 01:44 PM
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#262 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Cougar Country
Posts: 9,003
| Because while you were gone, Gav has developed amazing Internet superpowers.... people have tried to stop him..... but they can't! He's just too powerful. The only thing that can stop him is
We interrupt this thread to replace fencergrl with a new, improved gav approved fencergrl
How come buttercups are so yellow? 
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With special thanks to Mr. E...
“Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all others because you were born in it.” - George Bernard Shaw
Last edited by Fencergrl; 07-26-2006 at 01:47 PM.
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07-26-2006, 08:10 PM
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#263 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Seattle
Posts: 1,353
| because the chemical composition of the petals absorbs the rest of the visible light spectrum, allowing only "yellow" light to be reflected to your eye?
How come outer space is full of dark matter?
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"I cannot ensure success, I can only endeavor to deserve it" - Capt. John Paul Jones
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07-28-2006, 08:19 PM
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#264 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: no way am I telling you
Posts: 454
| Maybe it is, but we're all just too used to thinking of it as dark matter. Or, if it was light matter we'de all have really bad headaches all the time.
How come the king is so importand when the queen is the most powerfull piece on the chess board? | |
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07-29-2006, 01:26 PM
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#265 | | Senior Member
Join Date: May 2000 Location: The Reflecting God
Posts: 4,002
| Quote: |
Originally Posted by Warrior Princess Maybe it is, but we're all just too used to thinking of it as dark matter. Or, if it was light matter we'de all have really bad headaches all the time.
How come the king is so importand when the queen is the most powerfull piece on the chess board? |
Because taking the queen doesn't end the game. As in life, you can always get a new queen.....hee
How come the king can only move one space? I mean, how is he supposed to catch the queen?
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A WINNER IS YOU! | |
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07-29-2006, 06:53 PM
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#266 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: no way am I telling you
Posts: 454
| Because without women, men are helpless. Women have to do all the dirty work that men are incapable of doing. Plus it's gotta be hard to drag around all that state jewlry.
How come the smell of shaving cream (any type) makes me sneeze? | |
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07-31-2006, 01:13 PM
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#267 | | Member
Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Germany
Posts: 47
| Perhaps you're allergic or nobody has told you that it's not healthy to use cream for shaving your hair in your nose.
How come a grasshopper is able to hold itself at a carwindow while the car is driving with a speed of almost 150 km/h? (true! I saw it!) | |
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07-31-2006, 01:37 PM
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#268 | | Member
Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Germany
Posts: 47
| Oh, of course: the grasshopper was at the outside of the car | |
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02-20-2008, 08:25 PM
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#269 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Cougar Country
Posts: 9,003
| How come this thread died? (please read first post for rules before responding)
__________________
With special thanks to Mr. E...
“Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all others because you were born in it.” - George Bernard Shaw | |
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02-20-2008, 08:46 PM
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#270 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: redneckvill Oklahoma
Posts: 3,536
| because the wold is a cruel place 
How come cat's can't fly?
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“That’s not seduction! That’s ‘I made pudding’!”~Fabrice~
"They were not as far as appearance goes, anything but two soldiers at opposite poles from each other, but first of all they were both artists"
~Eugenio Corti, The redhorse.~ | |
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02-20-2008, 08:55 PM
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#271 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Cougar Country
Posts: 9,003
| They do if you help them. Mine gets flying lessons every night he wakes me out of a sound sleep by rummaging around in my sock drawer. Sometimes the cute little tyke comes back a few times for another launching.
How come my dog leaves my shoes in different parts of the house rather than keeping them together?
__________________
With special thanks to Mr. E...
“Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all others because you were born in it.” - George Bernard Shaw | |
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02-20-2008, 09:23 PM
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#272 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: East Lansing, MI
Posts: 156
| It wants flying lessons too.
How come I can never motivate myself to do work? | |
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03-03-2008, 06:21 PM
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#273 | | No, your mom's a lemur
Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: None of your Damn buisiness! Or California.
Posts: 2,832
| Because your work isn't porn.
How come this thread was so recently and hysterically revived? I mean, did you read my old posts? Wow!
Actually, let me come up with a better one. Hey! Cut that music out! This ain't the ****ing Oscars!
Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...................
How come boobies are so much fun to play with, but balloons stuffed under shirt mean nothing? | |
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03-03-2008, 08:21 PM
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#274 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Cougar Country
Posts: 9,003
| Perhaps you haven't dated enough California girls who have had breast implants. I suspect you would find they feel pretty much the same. 
How come cats seem to be able to sleep for 23 hours a day?
__________________
With special thanks to Mr. E...
“Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all others because you were born in it.” - George Bernard Shaw | |
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03-03-2008, 11:14 PM
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#275 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Northern Virginia
Posts: 468
| Because they need to save up their strength for the one hour they spend rivaling the energy output of a small nuclear reactor.
How come I find cat macros so bewilderingly hilarious?
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"...But that doesn't mean that sabreurs aren't fun. They are, and tend to be better kissers as well which is more than reason enough to take my coach's advice and hang out with the sabreurs my age." - WP (best coach advice ever)
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03-03-2008, 11:32 PM
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#276 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Gulf Coast Division
Posts: 2,414
| Because cats are hilarious. Everything they do is amusing.
How come the Earth is flat?
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... without remorse for the past, confident in the present, and full of hope for the future, [d'artagnan] went to bed and slept the sleep of the brave.
- The Three Musketeers
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03-03-2008, 11:35 PM
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#277 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Cougar Country
Posts: 9,003
| Because there are so many of us darn animals walking on it, stomping it from slightly curved to flat.
Why are we so easily amused by cats, dogs and Westley?
__________________
With special thanks to Mr. E...
“Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all others because you were born in it.” - George Bernard Shaw | |
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03-04-2008, 07:35 AM
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#278 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: SLC, Utah
Posts: 450
| Simple minds, simple pleasures....
How come some people can be chipper in the mornings and others come into work looking like something out of a bad zombie movie?
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I would challenge you to a battle of wits, but you appear to be unarmed.
"It's a sword. It is not supposed to be safe" - Death "Terry Pratchett's Hogfather"
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03-04-2008, 12:36 PM
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#279 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: ---->
Posts: 2,143
| Quote:
Originally Posted by Windsetter  How come some people can be chipper in the mornings and others come into work looking like something out of a bad zombie movie? | Because some people don't have the brainpower to realize that mornings are meant to be eased into gently. It's not like they even accomplish anything in the morning, they're just chipper. The superior human specimens are extra-productive from about 7pm through the wee hours, time when the sad little "morning people" are sleeping it off.
How come you can't cross the street in Europe without having to learn a new language? You'd think that after all these centuries their civilization would have evolved some kind of common language.
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Just because you have the right, that doesn't mean it is right.
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03-04-2008, 12:44 PM
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#280 | | Member
Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: BC, Canada
Posts: 46
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Originally Posted by Epee_Pox Because some people don't have the brainpower to realize that mornings are meant to be eased into gently. It's not like they even accomplish anything in the morning, they're just chipper. The superior human specimens are extra-productive from about 7pm through the wee hours, time when the sad little "morning people" are sleeping it off.
How come you can't cross the street in Europe without having to learn a new language? You'd think that after all these centuries their civilization would have evolved some kind of common language. | Germany tried that. It didn't work out so well.
How come I feel like I need to fence 8 hours each day? | |
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