Dating among club members

[glowstix]

Originally Posted by bmcfencer

I am not a chick!!! Glowstix, come over here so I can kick you.

Why are there all these demeaning or belittling terms for women, and not for men? I think it's because we intimidate you, so you have to try to make us smaller than we are.

And fencergrl is absolutely right. I have a LOT of single friends. Well, I'm single too, but I'm working on that. People look in the wrong places, and then give up and declare it a lost cause. Es triste.

you sure you want to kick me?? you're a CHICK..so come over here if you want to kick me!!

by the way, there is no right place or wrong place to meet people. i do stuff i'm interested in. i can't help if 99% of chicks don't fence...i can't take up an activity so that i can just meet people. i have to be interested in it.

bmc = CHICK!!!

[Fencergrl]

Originally Posted by glowstix

yeah, but the minute you start doing that, they think you're only doing that to meet them and that you only want sex.. there are NO places where guys don't hang. i do yoga already and yes, it is the only place so far where the number of girls outnumber guys but again, they are not single...and its tough to talk to girls in yoga class because its such an individual thing. besides the small talk before and after, there really isn't any other opportunity. and, again, they'll think you're only after sex.

I'm so surprised you're having problems Glow, cause I think you're a great guy.

When I've been single, I ignored guys that seemed to focused on sex right off the bat. Guys that showed an interest in getting to know me a little or had common interests always got my attention.

Even when I told myself I wanted to play the field a little, the truth was I was always looking for a relationship/ someone I enjoyed the company of.

Sex is best with someone you can laugh with before, during or after. So if a guy appeared to be looking for sex, I figured he was just looking for a penis receptacle and anyone would do, so why bother? I wanted something else, I wanted more than that.

I don't know if that was fair or not, it was just the way I saw it. Ask out the girls who you spend some time getting to know a little informally. I don't feel comfortable dating someone I know nothing about, I wouldn't feel surprised if other girls/ women feel the same way.

The other thing I have noticed about guys who are successful with women are:

1) They know how to give great compliments (without having them sound like they say the same thing to everyone). If a girl you like just got her hair cut, tell her it looks great. Or the color she is wearing really looks good on her. People like to be around someone who they feel good around.

My sister (who's single) tells me she likes checking out the guys in her alpine club. She watches how they interact with others. She notices if a guy treats everyone well, and not just the single women. Guys that are cruising are so obvious and focused.

2) They are less afraid of rejection. They know it is a numbers game. Meet enough people and pretty soon you find someone you "click" with.

3) They recognize the signals women give when they express interest and respond. It is hard to know if a guy is interested if he doesn't pick-up on any of the clues.

[bmcfencer]

Originally Posted by The Mormegil

It's easy to get the girl you don't want. It doesn't matter to you and they find that attractive. It's the one that really matters, that one you would do anything for, the one you love, that you can't get. why? you're an open book, it's written across you face, in you body language, your eyes. you're vulnerable and chicks don't like that. why, why, WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh gods. I wish this wasn't true.

and glow, I'm not suggesting anyone do things they aren't interested in, but that doesn't mean there aren't better places to meet people. As in, not chat rooms. Actually, I believe people tend to find persons with strong interests more interesting. That was a terribly constructed sentence, but you know what I mean. And, heck, the rugby player I"m pursuing is talking about starting fencing once the rugby season is over....

I'm not going to northern florida to kick anyone. Northern Florida is boooorrrring.

[glowstix]

Originally Posted by bmcfencer

I'm not going to northern florida to kick anyone. Northern Florida is boooorrrring.

i'm glad you realized that... and i'm not talking about chat rooms..don't do that, unless its on here. i was talking about personals. after browsing the numbers, its just an observation that the ratio is one sided.

Originally Posted by Fencergrl

I'm so surprised you're having problems Glow, cause I think you're a great guy.

thanks.

right now i'm single because i want to be. i'll be moving around quite a bit over the next 12 months or so, so i'm not interested in starting anything with anyone right now. my life is too unstable right now, i really can't see myself "dating" until at least a year and a half from now.

[D+F+P=Hadouken!]

What you all don't know is that glowstix is secretly a fantastically skilled player.

[glowstix]

Originally Posted by D+F+P=Hadouken!

What you all don't know is that glowstix is secretly a fantastically skilled player.

...................

[penguin_2000]

Oh... I regret missing the last 2-3 pages of this thread, looked like fun...

To Jack... if you haven't already asked her if she has a boyfriend, DON'T! It shouldn't matter, unless you want to ask him for permission to go out with his girlfriend...
First, you need to be in the mindset that she's just another girl you want to take out on a date, it'll give you lots of confidence, and she'll pick up on that. Ask her if she wants to go out for a bite to eat after practice. If her eyes get really big and she looks weirded out and/or she looks to the SIDE, then no dice! Say something like, "...yeah, I was thinking of getting a group of people to go out to eat," to get yourself off the hook. If (this is a big "if", considering the way you've pussy-footed about the situation) she smiles and/or looks DOWN, you're in! In this case, say something like "c'mon, we'll have a good time."
Good luck.

[Go? Fencing?]

Originally Posted by dilznik

You want a nice guy? Ask a guy out. Otherwise, you're going to get players who may be playing you.

Eh, I've tried that a few times. Hasn't worked yet.

[JackOfHearts]

Love is a hard enough thing to come by. One has to look where one can, be it in a bar, at school, or even in the fencing club. The pursuit of love is always a risk. There's a chance he/she could say no, and you're right back where you started. Then again, there's a chance she/he could say Yes, and that can come with its own set of problems. Different people are often looking for different things when it comes to a relationship. You won't really know what that is unless you take a chance and see if they're looking for the same thing you are. Often enough, its worth the risk of rejection, if only for the possability.

...




That being said, she said yes before I even finished asking.

[KD5MDK]

My girlfriend asked into my preparation. Isn't it great?

[bmcfencer]

Originally Posted by JackOfHearts

Love is a hard enough thing to come by. One has to look where one can, be it in a bar, at school, or even in the fencing club. The pursuit of love is always a risk. There's a chance he/she could say no, and you're right back where you started. Then again, there's a chance she/he could say Yes, and that can come with its own set of problems. Different people are often looking for different things when it comes to a relationship. You won't really know what that is unless you take a chance and see if they're looking for the same thing you are. Often enough, its worth the risk of rejection, if only for the possability.

...




That being said, she said yes before I even finished asking.

YAY!!!! *Does dance of celebration* Let's hope things go as well for me.

[D+F+P=Hadouken!]

Originally Posted by JackOffCocks

Love is a hard enough thing to come by. One has to look where one can, be it in a bar, at school, or even in the fencing club. The pursuit of love is always a risk. There's a chance he/she could say no, and you're right back where you started. Then again, there's a chance she/he could say Yes, and that can come with its own set of problems. Different people are often looking for different things when it comes to a relationship. You won't really know what that is unless you take a chance and see if they're looking for the same thing you are. Often enough, its worth the risk of rejection, if only for the possability.

...




That being said, she said yes before I even finished asking.

She must be really desperate for male attention then. Does she have a face like a bull dog?

[JackOfHearts]

Originally Posted by D+F+P=Hadouken!

She must be really desperate for male attention then. Does she have a face like a bull dog?

She's absolutely gorgeous! But I've been pondering her answer since last night, and I have a hypothesis on why she would say yes.

I try to be a gentleman. I'm not saying I am, but I try. I figure I should try to honest, sincere, and polite as much as I can because I want to be the best kind of man I can be. Now you're saying I should act like a dick because "most girls don't f*uck p*ssy's, they f*ck dicks" And you're partially right about that. Dicks do get ****ed. The kind of girl that settles on a dick usually milks him for all he's worth before dropping him. These kinds of girls sometimes play more then one dick at a time. I wont settle for a girl like that. I want a girl that has more self respect then that. Looks like I may get one.

And BMC: You're kind, intelligent, and if the comments of your friends are any indication you're also quite stunning (for the most part, i find green eyes to be very attractive. There was this one girl I knew that had greenish blue eyes that looked almost grey in a certain light *sigh* you'd be lucky if you had eyes like that). I'm surprised your rugby player hasn't asked you out yet. If things were different, I would definetly make a pass at you. So for his sake, I hope he comes to his senses and asks you out. Sounds like he's missing out on one hell of a lady, otherwise.

[D+F+P=Hadouken!]

Originally Posted by JackOffCocks

She's absolutely gorgeous! But I've been pondering her answer since last night, and I have a hypothesis on why she would say yes.

I try to be a gentleman. I'm not saying I am, but I try. I figure I should try to honest, sincere, and polite as much as I can because I want to be the best kind of man I can be. Now you're saying I should act like a dick because "most girls don't f*uck p*ssy's, they f*ck dicks" And you're partially right about that. Dicks do get ****ed. The kind of girl that settles on a dick usually milks him for all he's worth before dropping him. These kinds of girls sometimes play more then one dick at a time. I wont settle for a girl like that. I want a girl that has more self respect then that. Looks like I may get one.

For what its worth, its better than not being milked at all.

[bmcfencer]

Originally Posted by JackOfHearts

She's absolutely gorgeous! But I've been pondering her answer since last night, and I have a hypothesis on why she would say yes.

I try to be a gentleman. I'm not saying I am, but I try. I figure I should try to honest, sincere, and polite as much as I can because I want to be the best kind of man I can be. Now you're saying I should act like a dick because "most girls don't f*uck p*ssy's, they f*ck dicks" And you're partially right about that. Dicks do get ****ed. The kind of girl that settles on a dick usually milks him for all he's worth before dropping him. These kinds of girls sometimes play more then one dick at a time. I wont settle for a girl like that. I want a girl that has more self respect then that. Looks like I may get one.

Good, I'm glad she deserves you. Best of luck, and thank you for the compliments.

[dilznik]

Ye gods, I go away for three days and my hijacked thread unhijacks itself and explodes all over the place like Peter North.

Originally Posted by bmcfencer

And being friends with benefits when the other person is in a relationship. Hmm. Am I the only person who experiences moral angst about doing things like that?

Maybe. I don't have a problem with it. Well, depending on if the two bit tramp is cheating ON me or WITH me. When Mr Biggelsworth gets angry, people die.

Originally Posted by glowstix

yeah, that's the sad truth..fact is, chicks just aren't single. even the not so cute ones. stats don't lie. no matter where you go, there are at least 10 times as many guys as there are girls. you go online, same ratio. where do all these guys come from

Just the facts: Age structure of the USA: 15-64 years: 67% of population (male 98,914,382/female 99,324,126)
So there are more chicks than dudes. But they're all fat.
Age structure of the former CIS: uh, the math comes out to a staggering 20 million more women than men in the area formerly known as the USSR. And they're all hot. The further east you go in Europe, the hotter the chicks. Want a hot chick without doing a lot of work? Go to Slovakia or the Ukraine.

Originally Posted by bmcfencer

I am not a chick!!!

That's because you go to Bryn Mawr. G.L.A.D. is probably the largest student group on campus, isn't it? 1200 students and only three razors. Even the words "bryn mawr" are Welsh for "two big hills." Think about the correlation. Correllation. Corellation. Uh, anyway... the education is probably better there.

More comments related to posts that I don't care to quote:
penguin_2000 clearly knows who Ross Jeffries is.
Hadouken is way too jaded for a 15 year old. Someone needs his TV rights taken away. Although that "milked" pun was phenominally good, whether intentional or not. Get it?
BMC, just ask the rugby player out. There's exactly one reason why he would say "no," even if he's married: he's gay. NO guy would turn down a chick that asked him out unless she didn't have a nose or had something else whacked going on. And I actually would tell a chick her eyes are cool, but only if it were true.
Jack: quit thinking so much. You're going to blow it if you try and foreplan everything. Just be happy you got this far and see what happens. Deal with her when you see her and other than that, quit thinking about her. Because then you'll start to pick apart everything she does looking for positive signs and if you don't find them, you'll automatically start thinking negatively.
Besides, if she's in a fencing club Friday night then either she's crazy about fencing to the point where she'd rather go fence than go out (who would do such a nutty thing?) or she just generally can't stand going out on the town. Either way, she was clearly just there waiting for you. So stop worrying, stop analysing, stop thinking! You've already cleared the biggest hurdle.

[bmcfencer]

Originally Posted by dilznik

That's because you go to Bryn Mawr. G.L.A.D. is probably the largest student group on campus, isn't it? 1200 students and only three razors. Even the words "bryn mawr" are Welsh for "two big hills." Think about the correlation. Correllation. Corellation. Uh, anyway... the education is probably better there.

He he hehe. Bryn Mawr means "high hill" thank you, and that's just because our campus is a big f***ing incline. Trust me, I have to walk and bike up and down it. We have over 1600 students and you'd be amazed at how many of us shave. Our legs, that is. And armpits. The education is better yes, and the food, and the atmosphere and... well, most things. Men smell bad.

And I'm not even sure what G.L.A.D. stands for.

Okay, yeah, we are pretty feminist and nerdy. And rainbow. The rugby player isn't a man at all, you see. She's a beautiful, funny, brilliant, amazing woman. I'm bi. And damn, I believe I just came out of the closet to fencing.net.

Hey Ya'll, I'm a queer.

So yeah, that's a lot of the reason for my angst over pursuing said rugby player. I have no idea how to flirt with other women because I've only been out of the closet for... oh, less than a year. And no, I'm not attracted to most women. Or most men, for that matter. I'm picky, and I'm abstinate, and I'm terrified of homophobia so.... hmm.

I have enjoyed laughing at everyone's posts about how the rugby player must be a man. Heterosexism is funny. Sometimes.

And I believe I've done my one frightening thing for the day, and am now going to go back to writing that fencing article for the school paper.

Have a lovely afternoon.