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Andromeda · 10-03-2005, 02:44 AM

There for a while the dating inside the club was almost out of hand... and it kinda made things uncomfortable for some people. But since then it has most definitly settled down... I think the people in my club realize that club is for practice, you come there to practice and learn, but we (the club admin) don't care if they date inside the club, as long as they don't bring any drama to club.... I can't knock people dating teammates though... I married one!

schlager7 · 10-03-2005, 12:48 PM

I started fencing in 1995 and met my future wife there. We were married in 1996 and I've never regretted it for a second.

When it works, it works.

Go? Fencing? · 10-03-2005, 01:38 PM

In my high school club, we had some pairings, which often were the result of someone getting their boy/girlfriend into fencing. The pairings usually weren't problematic, except that the girls captain before I became captain seemed to be in it only because her boyfriend was. So she wasn't very dedicated to fencing (she's good except when she's lazy, which is most of the time) or to being captain, which made her a bad captain.

Other than that, a couple would do fencing, if they broke up, the one who only started fencing because of his girlfriend (didn't really go the other way) would usually leave. More interested in the girl than in the foil, I suppose.

KD5MDK · 10-03-2005, 02:02 PM

Quote:

More interested in the girl than in the foil, I suppose.

I'd understand that too if I had to put up with foil for a girl.

bjacobs · 10-03-2005, 03:25 PM

I can understand people's objection to team/squad/club/roomate etc. cest, in that it can be incredibly awkward in the case of a bad break up to have to encounter this person all the time, and to have so many mutual friends. But I can't imagine such considerations actually influencing my behavior.

I've been together with a girl from my team for over two years now. I'd have missed out on so much if I'd applied this artificial no team cest rule instead of acting on my feelings.

MyrddinsPrecint · 10-03-2005, 04:47 PM

if people are told over and over again, however, that dating within ones own club/team etc is a bad idea, then the only people who will break the rule are the people who have a good reason to--- ie, the people who are actually interested in a loving relationship rather than the people who are both bored and horny.

it's also much easier to date someone on your team than it is to date someone on in your weapon, of your gender. then you run into "but i'm competing with you for a competitive slot"........ which can still be done, depending on the people....... but it has the potential to make things very very awkward....

KD5MDK · 10-03-2005, 05:38 PM

I believe I pointed out when my club announced the "no members may date officers" rule that it meant (given with one exception none of them had any life at all outside fencing) we were condemning them to celibacy till they resigned.

So far, that seems to be true.

JackOfHearts · 10-04-2005, 04:41 AM

Personally, I've never dated anyone in the fencing class, or friday night fencing club (I fence at the local community college), but I have nursed a few crushes, and flirted a few times with some of the ladies there. I even asked one out, but as you can tell from my previous statement, nothing came of that. Though lately I have found myself wanting to get to know a particular young lady that I see at friday night club meetings. She's in the beginning class, and I've been helping her with her foil work. Still debating wether or not I should make a move, but I'm leaning towards not.

A girl that beautiful probably has a boyfriend. And I've never really succeded in asking anyone out. I don't see that changing in the near future.

VELISARIOS · 10-04-2005, 06:55 AM

Yes,it is.

fencerontheline · 10-04-2005, 01:59 PM

You know, I'm one of the one's that disagrees with the '****ting where you eat' thing. Not only do we approve of ****ing where you eat, but it's encouraged and made mandatory.

At my club, at the Universal Fencing Church of Botswana we have a mandatory day set aside for booty. Everyone from the club trades in their knickers for undersized thongs, and we all end up in one giant pile of tired and sweaty bodies by the end of the night.

RebelFencer · 10-04-2005, 02:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fencerontheline

You know, I'm one of the one's that disagrees with the '****ting where you eat' thing. Not only do we approve of ****ing where you eat, but it's encouraged and made mandatory.

At my club, at the Universal Fencing Church of Botswana we have a mandatory day set aside for booty. Everyone from the club trades in their knickers for undersized thongs, and we all end up in one giant pile of tired and sweaty bodies by the end of the night.

Is your club open to the public?

I_luv_saber · 10-04-2005, 02:34 PM

Well, here's my look on it...
1. When you mix people of the opposite sex (and even that isn't alwasys a requirement!) people will be attracted to each other, and act on it. If you take a mature approach to it, it'll be ok. I asked somone out, they were flattered, but declined. The first week was a little hard but we both knew it's better to not try and force something that isnt there. We are now still friends.

2. If someone quits fencing over a little temporary awkwardness, they didn't want to fence that badly to begin with.

that's my look on it anyways...

Quote:

eg, no snogging in the back during class

:snicker: snogging? :snicker:

MyrddinsPrecint · 10-04-2005, 07:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fencerontheline

You know, I'm one of the one's that disagrees with the '****ting where you eat' thing. Not only do we approve of ****ing where you eat, but it's encouraged and made mandatory.

At my club, at the Universal Fencing Church of Botswana we have a mandatory day set aside for booty. Everyone from the club trades in their knickers for undersized thongs, and we all end up in one giant pile of tired and sweaty bodies by the end of the night.

yay umass fencing thongs!!

broncofencer · 10-04-2005, 09:05 PM

My college club had a simple rule we called the Wes clause. It was written because someone (named Wes) tried to every girl that showed up. It didn't forbid dating but rather gave the club the ability to oust anyone who was harassing people or making them feel uncomfortable. That being said I dated the same girl from my club for four years. For two of those years she was my vice president it worked fine. After I left the next president violated the Wes Clause and the club soon fell apart. My current club is attached to a local high school so evferyone there is almost half my age.

I fence now because I love the sport. I started fencing to meet new people of both sexes. No one can tell me stop hanging out with the guys after practice so noone should tell me stop hanging out with the ladies either.

cellistic · 10-05-2005, 08:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ordway

That can work

My husband was an "armchair fencer" for years until I finally got him to try it, and we fenced at the same club for a couple of years. (Both sabre, so we fenced each other a lot.) It was fun and worked out fine. It was useful to keep in mind that we had different objectives - I'm serious about competition and he was more recreational.

Yeah seems like it works for you, but I've seen some pairs have domestics on the piste, and it isn't pretty. Neither of them can then show their faces at club for a few weeks. My policy- if you must date them, don't bout them.

JackOfHearts · 10-05-2005, 07:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cellistic

Yeah seems like it works for you, but I've seen some pairs have domestics on the piste, and it isn't pretty. Neither of them can then show their faces at club for a few weeks. My policy- if you must date them, don't bout them.

That could be a good policy I guess, though I've seen some couples in the fencing class/club actually grow closer together by bouting each other (including one engagement). Personally, I would love to hook up with lady I can bout with, though it'd probably be easier if we were both of the same skill level.

KD5MDK · 10-05-2005, 10:28 PM

Quote:

My policy- if you must date them, don't bout them.

What if you're up against them in a DE?

RebelFencer · 10-05-2005, 10:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KD5MDK

What if you're up against them in a DE?

Whichever gender you happen to be in the relationship: "Don't Lose!"

cellistic · 10-06-2005, 03:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KD5MDK

What if you're up against them in a DE?

I guess DEs are a different story because they can't be avoided. This is not in relation to dating, but I find that fencing good friends in DEs is fine so long as you both realise the frienship is more important ie. If you win, be humble and if you lose, run up smiling and encourage them in their next bout.

wrdbrn · 10-06-2005, 10:46 PM

Cant resist... cant... not built that way.. FencerMom.. amen sister, besides if they notice each other after an all day event or a particul