Westley, it's ok. Allow me to clarify:

a) The artist formerly known as Mr Louweasel is not dead (a close friend of his did pass on recently though so that's what you may have been thinking of)

b) However, he did dump me, so he has departed in a sense.

c) as a result of b), as far as I am concerned, destroy away! (only joking - he may not appreciate my true worth but I do not wish him harm)

LOL at the doc! Not sure repeated monkey-spanking is quite the solution, but I expect Wes can try it...

And you are right about the hair.

Sorry Mr Epee, is there something sexy about bashed-up ford transit vans full of plumber's equipment that I am missing?! OK, I admit it, I quite liked driving it...