07-01-2005, 02:48 PM
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#21 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Cougar Country
Posts: 9,008
| Inq and women
Contrary to what Inq claims, he has an amazing effect on women…
I once flirted outrageously with Inq just to get a peak at what he looks like behind the mask…. The ladies of my group haven’t been quite the same since.
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With special thanks to Mr. E...
“Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all others because you were born in it.” - George Bernard Shaw | 
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07-01-2005, 02:58 PM
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#22 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Lemont, IL
Posts: 349
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Originally Posted by cornflower In that case... Inquartata sure farts a lot. | Suuuure... blame it on the DOG. | |
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07-01-2005, 03:21 PM
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#23 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Anchorage Alaska
Posts: 1,582
| Inquartata's father was a cowboy (according to one of his posts), which, I'm sorry to say, I find really cool.
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John Matus
Anchorage Fencing Club
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07-01-2005, 03:25 PM
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#24 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: usa
Posts: 241
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Originally Posted by Sciurus-Rex Legend yet to be confirmed:
As a toddler, Inquartata was left at home by himself one day while his clan hunted mammoth or bison or something with great hairy bulk to eat. A passing gang of epeeists, seeing an empty camp, took the opportunity to raid and pillage. "No right of way!" the libertarian leader cried, jabbing his flaming epee at the sky for emphasis. All was proceeding according to plan, until the diaper-clad child stepped out of his family hut and challenged the epee chief: "Gaaaah!" Inq cried (an expression that would later be adopted by saberists everywhere in his honor).
At this point, the traditional storytelling structure would involve a great battle and a lot of blood and family-inapproriate adjectives, ending with a glorious triumph that would delight us all. Something unusual. We are, after all, talking about a child facing insurmountable odds.
Sadly, Little Inq was, indeed, unable to surmount the odds. The epee chieftain and his merry band of epee thugs carried the kid away as a trophy, and he spent the next seven years of his life refurbishing old fencing shoes for slave-labor wages. At some point he probably escaped in a blaze of glory, but that legend has yet to be turned up.
At least this might help explain why our hero enjoys a love-hate relationship with the epeeists on the epeeists-only thread -- he feels a twisted kinship with his ancient tormentors that he can't dissolve.
Or so the theory goes... | I laughed, I cried, I....well 
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If you step up to the bell, RING IT! | |
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07-01-2005, 03:36 PM
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#25 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 1,326
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Originally Posted by swordwench Hello. My name is Swordwench, and I am a closet fan of Inq. I rep him even though I know I'll burn in hell for it. I fawn to myself over his posts. Thoughts of his wit haunt my dreams. | "Admitting you have a problem is the first step to conquering it." -- introduction plaque at Inquartata Anonymous Worldwide headquarters. | |
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07-01-2005, 03:40 PM
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#26 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 1,326
| by the way, I just found a lock of Inq's hair for sale on e-Bay. Someone must have gotten access to his hairbrush again. Shame on you!
Question of the day: If you and Inquartata were alone on a desert island and ran out of food, which one of you would eat the other first? (And do you think Inqy would agree?) | |
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07-01-2005, 03:52 PM
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#27 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: DC & Vancouver
Posts: 2,071
| I'd eat Inq first. I don't have enough meat on my bones.
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My loverboy asked (in American Sign Language) what I was looking at on the computer:
Me: A fencing forum.
LB: A fisting forum?!
Me: God, NO! FENCING!
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07-01-2005, 06:56 PM
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#28 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: calgary,ab,canada
Posts: 2,418
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Originally Posted by Sciurus-Rex Who is he? What does he want? | he's the sabre fencer that's too busy tormenting the epeeists in our epeeists only thread. he secretly wishes he was an epeeist though..poor fellow..  | |
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07-01-2005, 07:01 PM
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#29 | | Din Älskling
Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Somewhere inside your head. Or am I?
Posts: 4,196
| You're right. Inquartata does kind of grow on you after awhile. Fortunately they have advanced surgical techniques to the point where his removal leaves no perceptible scars. The antibiotics clean the rest of him from your system.
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"Since when does being a patriot in America mean shutting your mouth?"
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zz,zz,zz,zz,zz,zz! | |
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07-01-2005, 08:23 PM
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#30 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Cougar Country
Posts: 9,008
| The first symptom is you see spots they're called... "Inq Spots" (feel free to groan).
__________________
With special thanks to Mr. E...
“Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all others because you were born in it.” - George Bernard Shaw | |
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07-01-2005, 08:42 PM
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#31 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Northern Ohio
Posts: 369
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Originally Posted by Fencergrl (feel free to groan). | *obligatory groan*
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When you lose your path, make a new one.
Difficile est longum subito deponere amorem
~Catullus | |
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07-01-2005, 11:42 PM
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#32 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Oregon, USA
Posts: 1,373
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Originally Posted by Fencergrl The first symptom is you see spots they're called... "Inq Spots" (feel free to groan). | They first showed up in Calcutta, which is why they are also called "India Inq".
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And yet, to me, what is this quintessence of dust?
~Hamlet
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07-01-2005, 11:56 PM
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#33 | | Senior Member
Join Date: May 2005 Location: NYC/Brandeis
Posts: 1,118
| You know, there's a small difference between a cute pun and a sickening series of bad jokes. That "India Inq" one almost made me throw up.
__________________ "What, really? I thought that song was just about a dragon who lived by the sea and frolicked in the autumn mist in a land called Honah Lee."
"Dan, you're such a dumb*ss"
Read it, be happy: Funny | |
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07-02-2005, 12:32 AM
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#34 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 1,326
| Hey, dude, ease off on the joke hate. Not all humor is cut from the same mold, but that doesn't make it "sickening."
Just calm down. Take a deep breath. And ask yourself, WWID -- "What Would Inquartata Do?" | |
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07-02-2005, 12:42 AM
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#35 | | Senior Member
Join Date: May 2005 Location: NYC/Brandeis
Posts: 1,118
| Alright, that was funny. Speaking of 'WWID', why hasn't Inq posted in this thread? Shouldn't he burst through the door right now and barrage us with sarcastic commentary?
__________________ "What, really? I thought that song was just about a dragon who lived by the sea and frolicked in the autumn mist in a land called Honah Lee."
"Dan, you're such a dumb*ss"
Read it, be happy: Funny | |
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07-02-2005, 02:25 AM
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#36 | | Boom!
Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Canada
Posts: 5,925
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Originally Posted by Fencergrl The first symptom is you see spots they're called... "Inq Spots" (feel free to groan). | Yeah, and you'll never guess where he gets his water from...
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Pound for pound, the amoeba is the most vicious animal on earth. | |
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07-02-2005, 04:36 PM
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#37 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: DC & Vancouver
Posts: 2,071
| In Soviet Russia... Inq Wells from water!
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My loverboy asked (in American Sign Language) what I was looking at on the computer:
Me: A fencing forum.
LB: A fisting forum?!
Me: God, NO! FENCING!
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07-02-2005, 04:36 PM
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#38 | | Question Game Queen
Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Southern Canadia
Posts: 15,736
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Originally Posted by ThatReallyHurt Yeah, and you'll never guess where he gets his water from... | Ha ha, no tap water for Inq! I bet he gets it from Inq wells.  | |
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07-02-2005, 07:48 PM
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#39 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 1,258
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Originally Posted by Araznal Alright, that was funny. Speaking of 'WWID', why hasn't Inq posted in this thread? Shouldn't he burst through the door right now and barrage us with sarcastic commentary? | not until there's a poll.
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I am but mad by north-north west. When the wind is southerly i know a hawk from a handsaw. -Hamlet
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07-02-2005, 08:17 PM
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#40 | | Senior Member
Join Date: May 2005 Location: Raleigh, NC
Posts: 914
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Originally Posted by cornflower Right now my dog is sitting next to me. I don't think it's him, unless Inquartata *really* is a 110 lb, black German Shepherd. | Don't joke! It might be true. | |
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