Gladiator Contest #3- Gladiator Stories

[Fencergrl]

Attention all Gladiators (Male and Female):
Post your best Gladiator story.

Everyone (yup you) rep the stories they like the best.

[Mr Epee]

The shy and timid might be thinking, What's a Gladiator story, but the true Gladiator knows in his heart.

To help everyone else out, here are a few Gladiator Story Attributes.

1. Doing battle for the entertainment of others
2. Picking a fight that was not your own (Bonus: You took a shot to the face)
3. Rising to an impossible challenge, for trivial reasons
4. Endangering your own life out of general manliness
5. Endangering your own life to impress a woman (Bonus: She's a stranger)


There are a few more, but that should get your mind headed in the right direction. Remember being a Gladiator is not for sissies.

[ThatReallyHurt]

Okay, here goes...

Highschool. One of my good friends was about 6'7" tall in grade 11 (I'm about 5'10" or so). He'd been having some problems with this one fellow (about 6'5", but quite stocky) from another area of the school who'd been saying nasty things about my friends' girlfriend. This was a Tuesday - I had just returned to school the day before after having my appendix removed.

Anyway, during class, my friend and I decided to wander to the cafeteria to pick up a soda or something, and we took a shortcut through the area that this other guy went to class in. I'm hobbling along, all bent over (back then, I thought it was manly to look like I was dying instead of just taking a Tylenol). I hear a noise that sounds like a wet "SMACK!" (I'll never forget it), I hobble around the corner and see my friend sitting on the ground against the wall, and this other guy standing in front of him. My friend is trying to get up but the other guy is thumping him and keeping him down.

Remembering all of the boxing and wrestling stuff my Dad showed me (he was in the Navy back in the 60's and spent a lot of time fighting in bars), I feel the rush of adrenaline, drop my books, somehow coax myself into a run, and jump on the guy's back. (I guess I should have paid more attention to Dad's lessons.)

To my horror, he doesn't fall over. He barely even stumbles. I hit him in the back of the head once, he then throws a blind punch over his shoulder which connects with the side of my head. He throws another one which misses, but the side of his watch cuts my forehead up near the hairline. I get off him and get ready to kick him in the crotch (I know, I know - but I was about to be crushed like a bug) when I hear a teacher yelling from way down the hall. I look towards the teacher, just in time to get a punch in the stomach. I feel something very strange happen, but ignore it and shoulder check him in the chest, pushing him back to the wall. He hits me again, I step backwards and trip over my friend who is back on his feet and moving to take this putz to pieces. He gets in two punches before the teacher arrives to break up the fight, leaving the other guy with a bleeding nose and what turned out to be a rather spectacular black eye.

I look down and notice that I'm bleeding through my shirt - I've popped stitches.

So, to summarize - if things hadn't stopped there, I may have ended up quite broken. As it was:
a) I didn't inflict any harm on my opponent (although I did rip the collar of his t-shirt).
b) My opponent left me with a bleeding forehead and four popped stitches, requiring another set of trips to the doctor and another four days off school.
c) I did, however, accomplish what I set out to do - I was trying to buy time for my friend to get up off the ground, which he did.
d) I did this whilst unable to stand up straight and still full of antibiotics from my appendix.
e) My girlfriend at the time didn't talk to me for over a week. Didn't come to visit me, either.

[broncofencer]

One Night whilst in college a party was held at the home I occupied with several of my fencing friends a great many beverages were consumed i was drinking from the bottle of rum. And A large brutish looking fellow was giving my roomate **** about being a fencing "F@&&*!!" I stepped in and said if you think your such a Bad @$$ then fence me. He said "no way am I wearing those dorky looking white clothes and mask." Being well intoxicated I obliged the man by only requiring saftey goggles to protect the eyes. We fencd sabre epee rules first to fifteen or yeild I won 10-2 took one across the face and one in the arm he stopped after his hand could no longer hold the weapon. everyone thought it was just some random fencing thing we did so they watched like it was a tournament. After wards I medicated my self further with a cold bottle of rum and he shut up for the rest of the night after we gave him the ice.

[Schiavona]

Zowie! Broncofencer, that hurt just reading about it.

Moral of my story; Never try Aikido while drunk.

My story; In my mid-twenties I like to go out drinking and dancing. I was fencing a bit and also studying Aikido at this time. One night at a bar I asked a young lady to dance. She accepted my invitation, never telling me that she had a very jelious boyfriend who had stepped out for a smoke. Suddenly, while we're dancing, this guy runs up to me and grabs me by both arms and starts shaking me. The girl says nothing at this, just turns and walks away. I have no idea what's happening, (John's observation about barfights; Only one person knows they're in a barfight for the first few minutes of the fight) but I think, "Ah-ha! Now I can use my Aikido!". I turn profile, reaching with the nearest hand to cup his chin, ready to grab the hand still holding me and throw him to the floor in a pin............and missed his chin. My open hand felt something soft go "squish!" and then became suddenly wet. At this time the bouncers showed up, brought by the girl who I had been dancing with. Because I had been drinking, my gentle "reach" for his chin was more like a hard thrust and instead of softly pushing his head away I broke his nose.

[Maeve_Mari]

Okay, here goes...


So, to summarize - if things hadn't stopped there, I may have ended up quite broken. As it was:
a) I didn't inflict any harm on my opponent (although I did rip the collar of his t-shirt).
b) My opponent left me with a bleeding forehead and four popped stitches, requiring another set of trips to the doctor and another four days off school.
c) I did, however, accomplish what I set out to do - I was trying to buy time for my friend to get up off the ground, which he did.
d) I did this whilst unable to stand up straight and still full of antibiotics from my appendix.
e) My girlfriend at the time didn't talk to me for over a week. Didn't come to visit me, either.

Swooooon... oh my what a hero.

[Moonitic]

Picture it: Two groups stand across the field from one another, arguing about who should be king. One is led by a brave young man who wields Excalibur & commands the Kings of the Round Table. The other, his weaker half brother, who has to bribe the best fighters in the world to defeat the one he is jealous of. The call to arms, then the melee begins.

Enter the half sister of them both. The beautiful, wicked sorceress. She moves forward to fight, beating her first opponent with magic. He stumbles back to go after someone of lesser power while a fellow knight...Lancelot...supposedly the best...moves in on her. At the height of their battle, he quite literally knocks her in the forehead with the quillion of his broadsword. She does not stumble back, despite the blinding pain. She finishes her fight.

The battle over, she hands her weapons over to the other sorceress & says, "I'm going to get a drink of water."

From behind, the knight asks, "Where did I get you?"

"Right here. No biggie." She points...& lies. She has no plans to stop. She knows she must continue. The show must go on.

The weaker brother, who overheard the exchange, walks up to her. In a low voice, he asks, "What happened?"

"I got hit in the head."

"Who?"

She points to the attacker. The brother nods, & says, "You had better tell the director. Get some ice on it."

So, she does. The director shakes his head when he finds out what has happened. The sorceress has become the latest victim of the knight's dangerous ways. She comes outside with an ice pack wrapped in a towel covering her eyes, to the surprise & horror of the rest of the group. She now has a large welt, bruised, above her left eyebrow. And a headache. A headache that ends up lasting for several days.

The sorceress is me. I play Morganna (aka Morgan le Fay) in The Legend of King Arthur stunt show at Silver Leaf Renaissance Faire in Comstock, MI. I can honestly say now that I have taken a broadsword to the head, & kept on fighting.

[Mr Epee]

B I N G O!

thwapp

NO!

[Schiavona]

B I N G O!

thwapp

NO!

Is Bingo if you're getting paid for it?

[UTEpee]

i once saved the earth from total destruction,
nearly prevented president lincoln from being assassinated (there were originally 10 assassins, i managed to take out all but one....),
invented electricity,
travelled faster than the speed of light,
turned water into beer,
made love to many beautiful women at the same time,
composed the greatest symphony,
written the great american novel,
hit with 20 in blackjack and not busted with my life savings on the line,
won the congressional medal of honor,
and been elected the greatest human in history.


but i have never won a fencing tournament.