Epeeists only

[Zasha]

Real fencers don't need a third person to tell them who won.

good one.

[Inquartata]

Festering usually starts from inside

I thought it started from the Addams family...

[Wise-Epeeist]

I am currently suffering from the only potentially problematic issue in epee: a seriously bruised toe from an overzealous foot-touch. A painful lesson to watch my distance more carefully.

[Fencergrl]

Fellow EPEEists.... I have sinned and have uttered blasphemy I never would have thought would ever pass my lips.

As some of you may know… I have on occasion, picked up a sabre. It all seemed innocent enough as I still fence EPEE (the one true weapon) most of the time…. until last night.

I was in EPEE class…. Warming up with my fellow EPEEists…. True followers who have never picked up another weapon.

We were discussing an upcoming fun EPEE tournament… when one of the older fencers asked about age groups. The instructor said it was completely open, so he could end up fencing a 9 year old… and my brain started thinking about the club hosting the tournament….

Eager to gain grassroots support for a vets class… I mention several veterans fencers… the instructor replied that they are foilists and this was strictly an EPEE tournament.

I had forgot, as I fence sabre with them… then it happened… my desire to start up some West Coast Canadian Veteran’s fencing took over and what I utter caused the entire class (complete with instructor) to turn, stare in amazement and ask “What did you just say???”

Yes… I am ashamed to say that my comment was… “If they can fence foil and sabre… they can fence epee”… I tried to recover by saying “Well I didn’t say they could fence it well!!” But it was too late…. and failed to convince them that I hadn’t taken one too many hard hits to the sabre mask.

So I enter the Holy Church of EPEE with my head hung low… seeking forgiveness from the EPEE gods, (in case I have displeased them a month before Nationals where I would be fencing EPEE). I will further pledge homage to the gods of epee by only fencing the one true weapon until Nationals... hoping this will please them and I would not embarass myself and hit with the side of my blade or scream loudly while attacking.

[needle]

Fellow EPEEists.... I have sinned and have uttered blasphemy I never would have thought would ever pass my lips.

Basic rule of dealing with embarassing situations:
Never confess and leave no witnesses.
Well, too late for that, I suppose

[Fencergrl]

I figured if nothing else... Inq would laugh so hard he'll hurt himself and be unable to contribute to this thread for awhile.

[tehcow]

So, is this thread as awesome as the name suggests?

[glowstix]

I figured if nothing else... Inq would laugh so hard he'll hurt himself and be unable to contribute to this thread for awhile.

sorry FG, i'm afraid we're stuck with ole' inqy poo,

[gtmac]

So, is this thread as awesome as the name suggests?

Yes, tehcow, this thread is indeed as awesome as the name suggests. However, that level of awesomeness is measured on a negative scale.

[Redblade]

Yes, tehcow, this thread is indeed as awesome as the name suggests. However, that level of awesomeness is measured on a negative scale.

... Because the sabreurs and foilists skew the average so very badly. It only takes a couple of 'em. Otherwise we'd be up in the positive triple digits of awesomeness.

[gtmac]

... Because the sabreurs and foilists skew the average so very badly. It only takes a couple of 'em. Otherwise we'd be up in the positive triple digits of awesomeness.

No, the (negative) awesomeness scale is reserved for epeeists. Foilists would never use a term as mundane as "awesome" to describe the vast superiority of their weapon. I won't speak for sabreurs and I'm sure they prefer it that way.

[seven6ty]

Yes, it's totally AWESOME to have your bout be won or lost at the discretion of your ref, instead of your fencing.

[Inquartata]

Oh, poor simpleton epeeists!

In sabre and foil one must exert one's skill and ability to making the referee see things your way, in addition to your actual fencing. This is an additional level of competence to which epeeists cannot ascend and which in fact their poor dull minds probably cannot even understand...

But we love you anyway, rather as we love our pets, even when they are barking at the sofa and smelling like dead cat.

[Fencergrl]

Dear Inq,

I have asked Fencergrl to channel my spirit so that I am able to get this message to you. I AM DEAD.... yes.... you forgot to feed Me, so yes, that is why "I smell like a dead cat".

Love,

Your (former) cat, Fluffy.

PS.... I asked the other cats in the neighbourhood to hang around you and your car so you wouldn't miss me. I hope this helped with your loss of having Me is your housecat. <fencergrl/fluffy takes a moment to preen>.

Yes, I know you miss Me very much....

Oh... and what you call a "mouse" tastes nothing like one. I didn't want to bring this up earlier as you seemed very attached to it.

[Zilverzmurfen]

But we love you anyway, rather as we love our pets

Funny, that's exactly how we épéeists feel about you sabreurs...

[needle]

Funny, that's exactly how we épéeists feel about you sabreurs...

Methinks, you got it mixed up, dear. We love foilists as we love our pets. We love sabreurs as we love our neighbours' pets

[scrapinpeg]

Hi, I'm Scrapinpeg, and I'm an epeeist.

(Hi, Scrapinpeg...)

It's been three weeks since my last saber bout. It's been tough, because I enjoyed it. But I'm being strong.

[D'Art]

Hi, I'm Scrapinpeg, and I'm an epeeist.

Foil slap!

last saber bout, I enjoyed it.

Double foil slap!!!!

[seven6ty]

In sabre and foil one must exert one's skill and ability to making the referee see things your way, in addition to your actual fencing.

Sounds like you'd be better fitted for acting, rather than fencing then.

[tehcow]

Sounds like you'd be better fitted for acting, rather than fencing then.

Not to mention all the insecurities that must drive their psychiatrists crazy. Their self-worth and achievement when it comes to fencing is purely based on someone else. At least we can take responsibility for our own success and failures.