The Worst Kiss Ever

[ThatReallyHurt]

I've kissed a few foreigners myself...

On purpose?

[PeterGustafsson]

Hi!


There is a huge (attendance 70-90K) 4-day festival in Denmark called Roskildefestivalen. I have been there several times. 4 huge rock scenes, many smaller ones, and on average several liters of beer/person and day.

At one time, I went over to the portapotty area and when ready myself, noticed a very drunk gal. She was barely able to stand due to drunkenness and was starting to aspirate her own stomach contents. Nobody else was close, and since I knew that this is a very serious condition, I decided to act. I went behind her and emptied her lungs by forcefully hugging her from behind - sort of a Heimlich manouver. This had the intended effect, since her lungs were cleansed, and she started to breathe without problem again.

At that instant, she in her drunken stupor realized that I had helped her, and decided that a thank was in order. So she turned around and planted a really sloppy smooch on my mouth. I will leave the smell as an exercise to the fertile imaginations of the readers.

Thanks, but no thanks.


Have a nice time!

Peter Gustafsson

[RebelFencer]

mmm, barfy!

[Lady Riposter]

I can't single out any one bad kiss that I've had but I do have a pet peeve when it comes to being kissed. I cannot abide the smell and taste of beer. I know, I know, many of you think that I'm really missing out, but I really can't tolerate the smell and the taste is even more difficult for me. I really dislike being kissed by a guy who has been drinking beer. It just takes all pleasure out of the kiss.

[mrbiggs]

There is a huge (attendance 70-90K) 4-day festival in Denmark called Roskildefestivalen. I have been there several times. 4 huge rock scenes, many smaller ones, and on average several liters of beer/person and day.

One time I went to a Polish wedding. 60 bottles of vodka. 50 people there, including 10 children. (Who didn't drink.) (At least, not that I know of).

Needless to say, my familly left rather early. It took me a few years to figure out why.

[Army Fencer]

Worst kiss:

First kiss. Neither of us knew what we were doing.

[BrianH]

Worst kiss:

First kiss. Neither of us knew what we were doing.

Ah yes, distinctly I remember how the noses got in the way, and I thought to myself that I should really watch tv more closely to see how to avoid the problem. That was in 1961, and I since have figured it out with much diligent practice.

[glowstix]

I will leave the smell as an exercise to the fertile imaginations of the readers.

eeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwww!! you got pukie kiss???? eeeewwwwwwww!!!!

[Maeve_Mari]

Hi!

At one time, I went over to the portapotty area and when ready myself, noticed a very drunk gal.

I'm having questions with this part - "when ready myself" - has me wondering what you were ready for??

[Vol_907]

Worst kiss:

First kiss. Neither of us knew what we were doing.

AH, but for the joy of discovering how to do it "right!"

jth

[Kismet]

My worst kiss...well...there were a few of them...one guy I dated was terrible at kissing. So slobbery, so sloppy, and he seemed to have a thing for shoving his tongue so far down the back of my throat that I felt like gagging. :s yeah. That was baaad.

[PeterGustafsson]

Hi!

Quote:
Originally Posted by PeterGustafsson
Hi!

At one time, I went over to the portapotty area and when ready myself, noticed a very drunk gal.

I'm having questions with this part - "when ready myself" - has me wondering what you were ready for??

Not ready for, actually ready with. In this case, ready with getting rid of at least one liter of Coca-Cola. I noticed her when I got out of the portapotty.


Have a nice time!

Peter Gustafsson

[Zilverzmurfen]

- has me wondering what you were ready for??

Ready for getting smooched by the girl. You're not paying attention, Mari...

(Sorry Peter, just joking. And I know what you meant!)