| Re: The FIE would prepare in secret a new arm to increase the penetration of fencing on TV screens really ?
Swiss Zorro wrote:
> A dispatch from ASP (Swiss Press Agency) :
>
> The FIE would prepare in secret a new arm to increase the
penetration
> of fencing on TV screens.
>
> The foil semi-final at the Olympics Games in Athens was a
revelation
> for Mr STONEHEAD president of the FIE :
> the popular and mediatic success which followed the fight
between
> Brice GRANDART,
> future Olympic Champion and the Italian CASSARATATA was never
seen
> before :
> brillant shots (and among them his famous and popular flicks)
from the
> Italian
> who leaded 12 to 7 before the French develops a magnificient
offensive
> game
> to come back and finally win by 15 to 14.
>
>
> So, the Foil, this confidential sport reserved to an
intellectual
> aristocracy and dominated by the mysterious community of the
"Maîtres
> d'Armes"
> could please the masses as it was and even television could be
> interested
> by it at another moment that the medal counting.
>
>
> "This is not surprising", says Patrice LAUBERGISTE, former foil
team
> Olympic Champion :
> "Foil is an arm which is based on attacking and defensing with
> priority to attack,
> full of creativity and subtle exchanges"
>
>
> Reforms should be undertaken as soon as possible to take
advantage of
> this good
> event which would permit to the officials and maybe to the
foilists to
> make good money.
>
>
> At the same time, Mr STONEHEAD was afraid : the matches were so
> intense and full of suspense
> that, due to increasing obesity and inactiveness of the mean tv
> watcher, could
> provoke many heart diseases and suing against the FIE.
>
>
> A commission of high level sport consultants was hired at once.
>
> The conclusions of the commission came soon :
>
>
> - foil matches do not last long enough and do not pause enough
to
> allow
> advertising breaks and give time to the tv watchers to get
themselves
> a good beer
>
>
> - seeing two lamps light at the same time and waiting for the
decision
> of the referee
> is above the intellectual level of the median tv viewer not
speaking
> of the colour-blind
> people
>
>
>
> - to train enough competent referees would not be realistic if
the
> success of this
> new arm was confirmed. Solutions must be found to simplify
refereeing
> even
> at the cost of perverting the spirit of Foil. However the end
of
> subtlety in foil
> will permit to athlets with more legs than head to join.
>
>
> - the great physical intensity of Foil does not contribute to
model
> the bodies
> of the fencers to current beauty standards which have a great
success
> as
> confirmed by the avent of beach volley
>
>
> - as proved by the success of beach volley, it is necessary
that the
> fencers show
> their bodies. In a first step, plexiglass masks will show the
faces.
>
>
> - the next step will be a transparent suit currently developed
by
> Bailleur which
> will allow fencers (male and female) to fight in bath suits
(and
> preferably
> strings).
> However this new transparent textile do not resist to flicks,
so
> flicks
> will have to be made impossible by invoking other reasons.
>
> The name of this new arm is not known yet. It coule be Flepee
but more
> probably Foilepee to be better accepted by the English and
Chinese
> speaking
> people.
>
>
> Study realized by Ian Bomber
>
>
----------------------------------------------------------------------
> -------------------------
> This is hoax. All similarity with reality is pure coincidence.
> You can nevertheless transmit it as widely as possible
otherwise
> you will fall asleep the next time you assist to a Foil
competition
>
>
>
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