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View Poll Results: Are you Republican/Democrat/other?

Voters
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  • Republican

    16 21.62%
  • Democrat

    26 35.14%
  • Other

    32 43.24%
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  1. #1
    Senior Member Array
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    Are you Republican/Democrat/other?

    Republican/Democrat/Other?

  2. #2
    Senior Member Array ReverseLunge's Avatar
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    Satan's evil plan has created jobs for hundreds of thousands of old lecherous pedophiles throughout this Godly country every December. These filthy homeless hobos just lay on their urine-stained cardboard beds 11 months out of the year, dreaming of Christmas when they can drunkenly traipse into the warmth of departments stores and have innocent little Christian children sit on their vermin-infested laps. Unwary parents happily snap pictures while Satan's obesely wheezing drunks ask their children whether they've been "bad" and whisper lewd suggestions in their angelic little ears with their filthy booze-breath and cigarette-discolored lips. How many unsuspecting tots have suffered a quick grope before Satan's little helper moves on to the next hopeful child in line?

    People think that Halloween is the time of year that Satan dresses up, but this is just flat-out wrong. See? The Devil will always try to fool you! Halloween is when Satan delights in watching humans dress in ways that will ensure them entry into the Devil's realm. But it is Christmas time that the Devil saves for himself! It is then when he puts on his most devious costume! And it takes no Sherlock Holmes to see that the Devil's annual disguise is none other than Santa! He even wears his favorite color -- demon red. Even his last name, "Claus," is Olde English for "hoof-claws." Lucifer may be the wiliest of all the deceitful demons that ever drew breath of fire in Hell, but he was pretty sloppy when he decided to try to spoil our Savior's birthday with this disguise. His big devil ego got the better of him when he decided to name his Christmas Anti-Christ after himself. He just moved around the letters in the name, "Satan," into a sonogram and got "Santa." Well, this is to put Prince of Darkness on notice: We are on to you Satan! And we unmask you and heartily rebuke you! Get thee hence from our Christ's birthday party!

    Satan once was God's favorite angel. But he tried a heavenly coup and God should have by all rights killed him right then and there. But God, being all that is good, gave him his very own place to rule and called it Hell. And even though God gave Satan free reign to tempt as many people as he wanted (even Christ Himself!) and lots of fabulous stuff to tempt them with (like eternal youth and Lincoln Continentals), Satan was still not satisfied. It made him jealous that Americans have made Christmas the most important retail event of the year, far overshadowing Satan's own holiday, Halloween. So Satan has tried to undermine Christmas by making Santa even more popular than Jesus!

    You don't think so? Even the law of the land forbids a baby Jesus in the town square, but who is there instead? You guessed it! Santa! Every time a so-called Christian child asks Santa for something, he is praying to Satan. With each request fulfilled, parents are unwittingly making a pact with the Devil. They may as well be writing in blood, "Satan please distract our children from Jesus with all these shiny toys!" But you know what? When your little boys and girls have grown up and no longer believe that Santa is real, they will find out just how real Satan is when he comes to collect their souls in exchange for all those presents! And God will turn a deaf ear to their pathetic wails of desperation. God will say, "You were more interested in that fat demon who was giving you presents than my Son who was giving you salvation, so you can all rot in Hell for all I care."

    So talk to your children before it is too late! Tell them that Santa is no kindly old man; he is an evil demon. And next time your family sees some propped up gin-soaked vagrant in a Mall wearing a red suit with white furry cuffs, set a good example and witness for the other deluded people waiting in line. Loudly, rebuke him! Announce to all the children in the store "Not only is Santa a lie, he will ravage you sexually, drink your blood and drag your palpating carcasses down to Hell with him!" It is only through setting a good example that we can put the Christ back in Christmas.

  3. #3
    Senior Member Array KShan5[PrFC]'s Avatar
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    Republican
    -Kevin

  4. #4
    Senior Member Array Tazz's Avatar
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    ALthough i dont live in the States I would DEFINATELY have voted for the Democratic party if I did.

  5. #5
    Senior Member Array glowstix's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tazz
    ALthough i dont live in the States I would DEFINATELY have voted for the Democratic party if I did.
    thats pretty much how the world outside the US feels.

  6. #6
    Senior Member Array telkanuru's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by KShan5[PrFC]
    Republican
    To our everlasting shame

    And you say you're from Massachusetts
    The only way to atone for being occasionally a little over-dressed is by being always absolutely over-educated. -Oscar Wilde

  7. #7
    Senior Member Array HillBilly's Avatar
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    other

    Openly Anarchist
    thetheory.tk

  8. #8
    Senior Member Array davtsung's Avatar
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    Republican in principle, Democrat in spirit, and Communist by practice
    Heaven is where the police are British, the chefs Italian, the mechanics are German, the lovers are French, and its all organized by the Swiss.

    Hell is where the police are German, the chefs are British, the mechanics are French, the lovers are Swiss, and it's all organized by the Italians.

    "I spent a lot of money on booze, birds and fast cars. The rest I just squandered" George Best

  9. #9
    Senior Member Array D+F+P=Hadouken!'s Avatar
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    I'm not totally sold on either idea, but my primary want is for a president that will keep the country safe from terrorists, and make sure that it stays on top socially, economicallly, millitarily, and sexually, and gramatically. Seriously though, as long as america is the top dog in the world, and nobody dares even look at us wrong, I'm happy.
    "I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. And from this side only! The flight of a half-man, half-bird. Dinosaurs nuzzling their young in pastures where strip malls should be. Cookies on dowels. All those moment, lost in time. Gone, like eggs off a hooker's stomach. Time to die" -Phil Ken Sebben

  10. #10
    Senior Member Array LUDICROUS's Avatar
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    Other, im a right wing conservative. But I'm not a yankee, and I don't really agree with Bush's policy. Do I care? No. He's top dog in the yard, he can do what he wants. Saddam had it coming, too.
    I am he
    The bornless one
    The fallen angel watching you..

  11. #11
    Senior Member Array Tazz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by glowstix
    thats pretty much how the world outside the US feels.
    Yes I know
    Too bad the rest of the world couldn't vote, as it affects us just as much, actually more...

  12. #12
    Senior Member Array Kismet's Avatar
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    Other. I'm not American.

    If I was American, I probably would have voted Bush. Don't hate me! Yeah he's an idiot, but at least he's an established idiot. Unlike Kerry, who promised all this good stuff yet never informed anybody HOW he would do all this good stuff. Bush, on the other hand, said what he was gonna do, said how he was gonna do it, and, as we all know, he sticks to his convictions.

    I guess it's the whole lesser of two evils thing?

    So I guess Republican, if I had to choose. But I'm not opposed to Democrats, really, either. So...both?

    Actually, I just don't like either. This is why Canada is good. We have a bunch of parties to choose from come election time.

  13. #13
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    Other. I'm Canadian. However, I likely would have voted as follows:

    http://www.hamsterforpresident.com/

    I mean, he is cute, and I doubt he would break promises. I love his platform, and...



    I miss the Canadian Rino Party. (Who made such promises as to repeal the Law of Gravity...)
    Some people are like slinkys. They serve no useful purpose, but it sure feels good when you push them down the stairs.

  14. #14
    Senior Member Array latenight's Avatar
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    I'm registered as an independent.

    I could give a crap about the parties, I vote for the candidate, not his/her affiliation.
    Whatever doesn't kill you, is gonna leave a scar...

    Looking for a certain Striptease......

  15. #15
    Gav
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    Moderator Array Gav's Avatar
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    Other. Funnily enough I'm from out of town.

    I would have voted for the hamster - if it wasn't for that fact that he would beunlikely to survive his first term. You should have had a better, longer lived rodent candidate let see ... A rat! Yes, I had some pet rats until recently - they make fine friendly pets. When cornered they're pretty good in a fight. Perfect.

  16. #16
    Posting Hound Array Zilverzmurfen's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kismet
    I'm not American.
    Isn't Canada that country nort of the US, in North America..?!
    Fencing is my only PvP.

  17. #17
    Din Älskling Array esskreemr's Avatar
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    Well, everyone knows that I'm a conservative, Gawd-feerin' Republican.



    Actually, I changed my reg from Repub to Dem. Like many others I know, though, neither the Repubs or the Dems fit my world view. I'm definitely a few notches to the liberal side but there are many (actually most major issues fall here) issues that I feel I stand in the middle of the road. There is never any one clear cut answer to anything. As far as politicians go, I'm sure there are many who ethical, compassionate, and fair. Most of them are mud-sucking bottom feeders with power.
    "Since when does being a patriot in America mean shutting your mouth?"
    ---

    zz,zz,zz,zz,zz,zz!

  18. #18
    Member Array Calder's Avatar
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    Republican...
    Because in 1987 Reagan kicked the crap out of.....(someone older and wiser fill in the name here...that Soviet President/PM/Dictator, whatever...white hair??) in that boxing ring surrounded by delegates in the basement of the U.N.....And there was a band playing...I even remember the words..."when two tribes go to war, one is all that you can score"....ya, Frankie goes to Hollywood I think!

  19. #19
    Senior Member Array Alain's Avatar
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    I'm British/French... but if I was American, I'd vote for someone other than Bush. My labrador, perhaps, but not Bush...
    Alain
    Reading Fencing Club
    Duellist London
    I'm too lazy to hold a grudge...

  20. #20
    Senior Member Array civiltech's Avatar
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    A card carrying member of the Coservative Party of Canada here...

    However if I was American, I'd probably voted Reform....or your third party. Whatver that party is called,....you know the one with him...uh...Ross Perot?
    "Politicians debating the future of our monarchy resemble a poachers’ convention deliberating on the future role of the gamekeeper."
    Malcolm Winram, The Times, 9th March 1996.

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