10-15-2004, 01:51 PM
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#1 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Way Out West
Posts: 6,092
| Curse the darkness (more political humor)
How many members of the Bush Administration are needed to replace a light
bulb?
The Answer is TEN:
1. One to deny that a light bulb needs to be changed
2. One to attack the patriotism of anyone who says the light bulb needs to be changed
3. One to blame Clinton for burning out the light bulb
4. One to tell the nations of the world that they are either: "For changing the light bulb or for darkness"
5. One to give a billion dollar no-bid contract to Haliburton for the new light bulb
6. One to arrange a photograph of Bush, dressed as a janitor, standing on a stepladder under the banner "Light Bulb Change Accomplished"
7. One administration insider to resign and write a book documenting in detail how Bush was literally "in the dark"
8. One to viciously smear #7
9. One surrogate to campaign on TV and at rallies on how George Bush has had a strong light bulb-changing policy all along
10. And finally one to confuse Americans about the difference between screwing a light bulb and screwing the country.
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"In theory, theory and practice are the same, but in practice, theory and practice are different."
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10-15-2004, 03:27 PM
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#2 | | Member
Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: Ohio
Posts: 68
| lol...
What I wouldn't give for an administration who saw shades of gray instead of black and white!
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10-17-2004, 03:38 AM
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#3 | | Curmudgeon Emeritus
Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Somewhere in your nightmares!
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| And if you get it---what won't you be made to give?  | |
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10-17-2004, 09:37 AM
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#4 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Way Out West
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| Huh?
(extra characters.....)
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"In theory, theory and practice are the same, but in practice, theory and practice are different."
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10-17-2004, 09:39 AM
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#5 | | Curmudgeon Emeritus
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| Little too early for sophisticated humor, Jeff?  | |
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10-17-2004, 10:40 AM
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#6 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2003
Posts: 2,464
| Or maybe WAY to obscure to even be humorous.
I LOVED the list! My favorite: 6. One to arrange a photograph of Bush, dressed as a janitor, standing on a stepladder under the banner "Light Bulb Change Accomplished"
Proves the point that ANYONE can be put into the position. (errrr, literally  ) | |
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10-17-2004, 11:05 AM
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#7 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Way Out West
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| Inq, it was too obscure as humor for me... Smiley or not, I couldn't tell if you were serious.
I wonder who did the first light bulb joke - it's such a rich genre. Surely should be a Nobel Prize for it.
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"In theory, theory and practice are the same, but in practice, theory and practice are different."
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10-17-2004, 11:51 AM
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#8 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2003
Posts: 2,464
| Speaking of which, I saw the movie "Friday Night Lights" the other day. I got out of it two things. One, West Texas (and Midland, Texas) appeared desolate and abandoned. Two, that Daddies in Texas make their sons do things in order to carry on the memories (and failings) of their own past. Very demanding those fathers of Texas, to do as they did - even when the sons didn't have the passion or conviction of their patriarch.
Last edited by Maeve_Mari; 10-17-2004 at 11:54 AM..
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10-17-2004, 12:01 PM
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#9 | | Senior Member
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Posts: 279
| correct me if I'm wrong, but aren't both Bush jr. and sr. from New England? Connecticut, if memory serves.
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10-17-2004, 12:13 PM
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#10 | | Member
Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Central Illinois
Posts: 56
| I was going to advise Zen to "be careful what you wish for", but Inq's answer was much more sublime!
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10-17-2004, 01:06 PM
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#11 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2003
Posts: 2,464
| Quote: |
Originally Posted by riptide correct me if I'm wrong, but aren't both Bush jr. and sr. from New England? Connecticut, if memory serves. | Bush, Sr. ventured into Texas and the Oil business not long after WWII. In Bush, Jr.'s bio it's cited that he was raised in Midland and Houston, Texas.
What's your point?
Did you interpret my comment about "Daddies and their failed legacies" to mean I was talking about the Bush family vocation? | |
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10-17-2004, 01:22 PM
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#12 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2004
Posts: 279
| Indublitably.
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"Sometimes you want to give up the guitar, you'll hate the guitar. But if you stick with it, you're gonna be rewarded."
-Jimi Hendrix
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10-17-2004, 02:04 PM
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#13 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 4,091
| Quote: |
Originally Posted by Maeve_Mari Speaking of which, I saw the movie "Friday Night Lights" the other day. I got out of it two things. One, West Texas (and Midland, Texas) appeared desolate and abandoned. Two, that Daddies in Texas make their sons do things in order to carry on the memories (and failings) of their own past. Very demanding those fathers of Texas, to do as they did - even when the sons didn't have the passion or conviction of their patriarch. | And Hollywood-produced movies are, of course, great ways to judge a region. | |
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10-17-2004, 03:44 PM
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#14 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Boston, MA
Posts: 6,595
| I didn't notice any philisophical concepts in Dogma that were particularly logically flawed (concepts, not "the angels are trying to get back into heaven", which is the storyline).
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lol wut?
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10-17-2004, 05:28 PM
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#15 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 4,091
| Region, not religion. I have not seen Dogma myself, but still would be quite hesitant to judge a religion based on the way it is portrayed in a movie. | |
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10-18-2004, 04:49 AM
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#16 | | Curmudgeon Emeritus
Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Somewhere in your nightmares!
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| Quote: |
Originally Posted by Maeve_Mari Or maybe WAY to obscure to even be humorous.
| Tsk! Split infinitive. Naughty. | |
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10-18-2004, 04:56 AM
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#17 | | Curmudgeon Emeritus
Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Somewhere in your nightmares!
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| Quote: |
Originally Posted by jeff Inq, it was too obscure as humor for me... Smiley or not, I couldn't tell if you were serious.
| At the risk of violating the First Rule of Comedy ( Never explain a joke ): Quote: |
What I wouldn't give for an administration who saw shades of gray instead of black and white!
| Quote: |
And if you get it---what won't you be made to give?
| IOW, if he gets that for which he would "give anything", ie an "Administration who saw shades of gray", ie a Kerry Administration, what will he not be forced to give in return for it, in terms of taxes, a hamstrung private sector, a timorous foreign policy, etc? | |
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10-18-2004, 08:04 AM
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#18 | | Senior Member
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Posts: 2,464
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Originally Posted by Inquartata Tsk! Split infinitive. Naughty. | No, I'm serious. I don't think I did understand it to "even be humorous."
Your comment, dear sir, is not astute, nor even humorous.
Is that better?  | |
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10-18-2004, 08:41 AM
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#19 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Way Out West
Posts: 6,092
| Inq - I see - you claim that having a government that isn't simple-minded (can see more than black and white) leads to more taxes, weak foreign policy and &etc. That's counterfactual- we've had administrations with brains and without those defects. Or, are you still in humor mode?
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"In theory, theory and practice are the same, but in practice, theory and practice are different."
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10-18-2004, 09:27 AM
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#20 | | Curmudgeon Emeritus
Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Somewhere in your nightmares!
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| Quote: |
Originally Posted by Maeve_Mari Your comment, dear sir, is not astute, nor even humorous.
Is that better? | I....am not sure.  | |
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