Nominee for "Stupidest Person of the Year"

[pkt]

When, one day, you feel really stupid, - we all have those days, - just read the following and i'm sure you'll feel downright Einsteinesque.

==)----------------

A nominee for the "Stupidest Person of the Year" Award.
"Somerset County Sheriff Barry DeLong said Monday that no charges will be filed. "There is no crime here," he said."

It's not a crime to be stupid.

Strange as it may seem, no amount of learning can cure stupidity, and formal education positively fortifies it.

~ Stephen Vizinczey – babelfield systems - http://www.babelguides.com/view/person/5993

It is significant that "he had not seen the hit movie "The Passion of the Christ," which depicts the Crucifixion of Jesus."

Another American and he's not even living in the South!

Is it just because the media presence is so much stronger in the States, or...

PK

==)----------------

http://www.kron4.com/Global/story.as...4&nav=5D7lLZIu

Man Attempts Suicide by Crucifixion
Posted: March 16, 2004 at 10:16 a.m.
HARTLAND, ME — A Hartland man was treated at a Pittsfield hospital after he nailed himself to a cross. The 23-year-old man apparently was trying to commit suicide Thursday evening in his living room, the Bangor Daily News reported.

Somerset County Sheriff Barry DeLong said Monday that no charges will be filed. "There is no crime here," he said.

Police said the man appeared delusional and told them he had been "seeing pictures of God on the computer." He told them he had not seen the hit movie "The Passion of the Christ," which depicts the Crucifixion of Jesus.

Lt. Pierre Boucher said the man took two pieces of wood, nailed them together in the form of a cross and placed them on the floor. He attached a suicide sign to the wood and then proceeded to nail one of his hands to the makeshift cross using a 14-penny nail and a hammer.

"When he realized that he was unable to nail his other hand to the board, he called 911," Boucher said.

It was unclear whether the man was seeking assistance for his injury or help in nailing down his other hand.

Hartland Fire Department members responded, said Boucher, and cut off the wood while it was still attached to the man's hand. The wood and the victim were taken to Sebasticook Valley Hospital, where the nail was removed.

Boucher said he did not know whether the man received further treatment.

(Copyright 2004 by The Associated Press. All Rights Reserved.)

- 30 -

[Tireur]

Another American and he's not even living in the South

Sounds like mental problems to me, which can go hand in hand with stupid, but, what do you mean by "another American"? And what does "not even living in the South!!!" have to do with anything???

[telkanuru]

I'd nominate for Bush, just because of his manned mission to Mars idea. That's all. No other politics involved. $450 billion for a trip to Mars. Yeah, they dropped that one fast. Actually, I nominate whichever of his advisors thought that one up.

Self crucifiction is a statment. Anyway, if you survive, stigmata are like, chick magnets, right?

[Peach]

Insanity has little to do with stupidity.

[pkt]

More of the same...

pk


Subject: Top 8 Morons of 2003


1. WILL THE REAL DUMMY PLEASE STAND UP?
AT&T fired President John Walter after nine months, saying he lacked intellectual leadership. He received a $26 million severance package.
Perhaps it's not Walter who's lacking intelligence.

2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS:
Police in Oakland, California spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself inside his home. After firing ten tear gas canisters, officers discovered that the man was standing beside them in the police line, shouting, "Please come out and give yourself up."

3. WHAT WAS PLAN B???
An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun, kidnapped a motorist and forced him to drive to two different automated teller machines wherein the kidnapper proceeded to withdraw money from his own bank accounts.

4. THE GETAWAY!
A man walked into a Topeka, Kansas Kwik Stop, and asked for all the money in the cash drawer. Apparently, the take was too small, so he tied up the store clerk and worked the counter himself for three hours until police showed up and grabbed him.
[It took the police THREE HOURS to get there? - pk]

5. DID I SAY THAT???
Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery suspect who just couldn't control himself during a line-up. When detectives asked each man in the line-up to repeat the words: "Give me all your money or I'll shoot," the man shouted, "that's not what I said!"
[Well, d'oh!, one has to make sure that it's correct! - PK]

6. ARE WE COMMUNICATING??
A man spoke frantically into the phone,
"My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart!"
"Is this her first child?" the doctor asked.
"No!" the man shouted, "This is her husband!"

7. NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED!!
In Modesto, California, Steven Richard King was arrested for trying to hold up a Bank of America branch without a weapon. King used a thumb and a finger to simulate a gun, but unfortunately, he failed to keep his hand in his pocket. (hellllllooooooo!)

8. THE GRAND FINALE (I LOVE THIS ONE!!!)
Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert, an hour east of Bakersfield, Cal. some folks, new to boating, were having a problem. No matter how hard they tried, they couldn't get their brand new 22-ft boat going. It was very sluggish in almost every maneuver, no matter how much power was applied.
After about an hour of trying to make it go, they putted to a nearby marina, thinking someone there could tell them what was wrong. A thorough top-side check revealed everything in perfect working condition. The engine ran fine, the out drive went up and down, and the propeller was the correct
size and pitch. So, one of the marina guys jumped in the water check underneath. He came up choking on water, he was laughing so hard.
NOW REMEMBER... THIS IS TRUE.
Under the boat, still strapped securely in place, was the trailer.
I guess they must have been excited about their new boat. - PK

[jeff]

Insanity has little to do with stupidity.

Very true! Here's a story I was told, and is supposed to be true: Motorist breaks down with a flat tire on a steep hill near an insane asylum (there's probably a PC word for that now). One of the inmates is watching him from behind the wired-in fence as he jacks up the car, removes the lug nuts, and places them on the ground. As the driver is positioning the spare, the lug nuts roll down hill out of sight. Now he doesn't know how he can mount the spare - and he's visibly stuck for an answer. The inmate behind the fence says "take one lug nut off each of the other wheels; that way you'll have 3 per wheel which will be plenty for you to drive with till you get new ones." The motorist is amazed at this idea (which saves his day), and says "my god, if you can do that, why are you inside?". The inmate gives him a disgusted look and says "I'm in here because I'm nuts, not because I'm stupid!"

[Tireur]

Looks like someone finally saw a 10 year old internet joke list......

[telkanuru]

Such a cynic :P

I reccomend the Darwin awards (www.darwinawards.com) iff'n y'all havn't already seen them, which would mark you as considerably withdrawn from internet culture. Some examples:

1) Man in Russia uses a power line placed in a river to kill fish for eating. It works, but the man forgets to remove the power line before retrieving the fish. Sizzle.

2) Man who shot himself in the head after grabbing his S&W .38 special instead of the phone when it rang at night.

3) Man who lost at Russian roulette after he decided it would be more daring if he played it with a semiauto pistol.

4) Men in Cambodia who played a variant of Russian Roulette which involved stomping on an anti-tank mine.

Have you noticed all these involve men? I don't like having the y-chomisone so much anymore...

[PeterGustafsson]

Hi!

Such a cynic :P

I reccomend the Darwin awards (www.darwinawards.com) iff'n y'all havn't already seen them, which would mark you as considerably withdrawn from internet culture. Some examples:
<snip>
Have you noticed all these involve men? I don't like having the y-chomisone so much anymore...

Well... do a web search on sociobiology and "the expendable sex", and you will see an explanation for why men do stuff like that. It is also linked to that fact that women have uteri, not men. (or a readers´exercise: figure out the connection between those facts for yourself)

I has been stated that while men and women have the same average IQ, the standard deviation in IQ (and a host of other quantifiable stuff) is larger among men than among women - thus more male dummies.

Have a nice time!

Peter Gustafsson

[ecuaman]

which also means more smart men since the distribution is probably normal and symetric.

[Strytllr]

In regards to IQ, please remember that those tests are often logic driven. Not to offend women, but men are more logic oriented, while women tend to be more emotional and instinct driven. So IQ tests do not adequately illustrate the differences between male and female thinking abilities.

[Peach]

You don't quite understand what Peter said. There are more males on both ends of the spectrum, but the overlap in the majority is so considerable that it doesn't really make sense to say that women are "less logical" than men in any broad general way. It does, however, make sense to say that on the average , women are likely to be less frequently represented in both ends than men.

Of course, there are females at both ends as well. And I take issue with the idea that IQ necessarily tests logical ability in any real-world sense, because if that were true I would be one of the most profoundly logical people in the world. I think the tests are fundamentally hogwash.

[Soldier]

There may be more men, but that's where the standard deviation comes in - it helps compare different populations of different sizes. Also, who's to say that the distribution is normal and symmetric?

[Peach]

Actually, there are about the same number. There are just more males at either end of the distribution.

[Soldier]

Hence the larger standard deviations.

[npkeith]

Did any one watch "The Young Ones" in the early '80's? In the first episode Rik tried to crucify himself in protest over the councils plan to demolish the house. Neil comes out of the house and says:

NEIL: Yeah but I really think I should lay this one on you, man, that's a really negative way to kill yourself, you know, like, I've tried it, hundreds of times. There's no way you can hammer in the last nail.

I remember falling off my chair laughing. Of course, I may have been drunk at the time.
-Keith