Fencing.Net - Your Guide to Fencing & Fencing Equipment

Oh you epeeists and your "no priority". Lord, you don't even like our little white lights!!

I stated quite clearly that I knew it was a simple feign when I said "roosters don't steal eggs". Just because your intended action fails, doesn't mean it's my fault for not falling for it.

Just like a foilist to argue after the point is made. No ref worth their salt will change a call because of a foilist's whimpering. The ref would merely reply "No sir, in epee there is no priority, you had no "right" to your attack, you walked into your opponent's blade". Enguarde

Qbranch cries fowl [sorry, couldn't resist!]. Barnyard Dawg failed to notice that Foghorn was, all along, merely a disguise for the Weasel. Dawg's function is to protect the henhouse and in failing to do so, in the wake of Weasel's sneaky deception, lost the point.

[Weasel, briefly adopting the voice of Foghorn: "Ah do declare I am satisfied."]

Why should a dog care about the eggs? Roosters don't steal eggs, they protect the hen house from that. A rooster would not turn himself into something that would be counter-productive to his role. In fencing, the equivalent to Barnyard Dawg sticking his arm out and letting Foghorn impale himself (because he thinks priority will save him)

Silly, silly foilists! They get so confused and don't know what's going on unless there is a ref there to tell them (or in this case an epeeist). Point right for Barnyard Dawg.

Seeing the Barnyard Dawg's tactical manoeuvre well in advance Qbranch launches a speedy counter-attack, transforming himself into the Greedy Weasel and stealing the henhouse eggs before the drowsy epeeist wakes. Haha!! Long live the foil!

Fencergrl does her best Barnyard Dawg imitation of pretending to sleep and ignoring the yappy rooster *Which coincidentally is a well-known epee tactic of not falling for a foilist's attempts at feigning an attack.

Madam, [adjusts Kentucky Colonel bow tie and adopts voice of Foghorn Leghorn]

You... ah say... you have insulted my honour and the dignity of all foilists! Ah demand satisfaction!!

[uses frail, bandy and aged arm to raise Mint Julep to his lips, awaiting a response]

My Dear,

It is you who has been mislead. That flimsy ineffective weapon is awkward to hold much less do anything else with it. If I want something light and whippy, a sabre suits me just fine. Most of the time however, I find the firmness of the epee comfortable and always up for what ever task I require of it.

However, perhaps being old and frail, the epee is a little bit too much weapon for you.

Oh Fencergrl... I had no idea you had been so mislead about foil!! You poor dear. Time for some intervention. We need to rectify this problem quickly. Now please put down that clunky thing and reach for the other weapon over there. Yes... that's it... the elegant, refined one. Pick it up. Feel the lightness? So perfectly balanced... so perfectly engineered for rapid, graceful movements! Now doesn't that feel better? I suggest a few more sessions and you'll soon be right as rain!

Back in the day I guess. It's hard enough to build a community of fencers in this country so kudos to you for doing your part! How ironic that the only f-net folks I've met have been American...