I knew my coach was a good fencer, but this NAC-C was my first chance to see him compete against his peers and I thought it was awesome. His only defeat in his pool was to Inquartata and he finished tied for third place.
I didn't get into Philadelphia until about 2:00 because a plane landed gear-up on one of the runways and shut the airport down for a couple of hours. So I taught the next day on two hours sleep. Last night, though, I went to bed at 6:00 and woke up just now at 5:00. Fortunately, winter break starts at the end of the week.
I watched a little bit of the video Ahren took and showed my students a short clip--I am mostly struck by the way I look like a little toy train, very upright
The day began with me finding a quiet place to practice and then, once I realized the place was truly vacant, I just sat down in a chair and cried until I got all the grief for yesterday out of my system.
I'd been stupid. There is no rewind and play button on reality. Time to move on.
I went for a brief walked and admired the beauty around me, took a deep breath, and went back to practicing footwork on vacant strips before directors showed up and I had to move elsewhere.
Words cannot express how badly I fenced and I have no one to blame but myself. I can boil it all down to mental state and boil it down even further to a simple line: Stop being afraid to fail.
Unfortunately, I didn't realize this in time and finished worse than I've ever finished at a NAC. Yes. Even worse than my first attempt. Really. It was horrible.
I began by fencing Delia and developing a nice lead that I promptly lost.
I then had Deb 4-0 or 4-1
I took lessons from Istvan on 6 and 14 Dec, and trained in Mannheim on 10 December.
Basically just keeping score. I can't remember the lessons--they were both long, involved, interesting and worthwhile--I just can't recall the content of an hour lesson.