When I signed up for Nationals, I decided that maybe that shouldn't be my first tournament in three years, so I found two tournaments in the general area and signed up for them. The night before the first one, I went to bed at just the right time to get up and drive halfway across the state at 5 AM. And then my ex and a very drunk bimbo came in at 1 or so and he tried to help her puke and she lay on the floor of the bathroom screaming about how she just wanted to lie down. It took me ages to get back to sleep. And then, once I did, she came wandering into my bedroom at 4 and turned on the lights, then wandered out and left all the lights on. Hard to be mad at my ex for being a decent guy and babysitting her, but I was really mad to miss that tournament. It meant that I had a lot of stress about doing this one.

But, you know, I think that it was about what I needed. I didn't have time to fence any warm-up bouts, but I went through the rest of my routine and felt comfortable with it, even though I haven't had the chance to go through the routine in months. I was pretty tense for my first bout and didn't think very well during it. I won by simply fighting out each touch better than my opponent, but I really didn't have much plan or ability to set things up. I got hit a lot by not being prepared for her attacks are remises. Meh. My second bout was against a decent fencer with a style similar to mine. I started with front foot/back foot ideas, but that wasn't the right solution. I worked the kata later in the bout, but it was too late. It was a good idea, though. Next time I need to try feint in tempo against her. I bet it will work well. My third bout was good. I figured out how to watch and analyze in between bouts again, which I wasn't doing at first. I took my opponent apart. Same for the next one. Or the next two? Hmm, I'm forgetting those bouts already.

My first DE was fun. That bloodthirsty, tearing raw flesh with my teeth feeling. It's not a good place for me to be at the start of a bout, but it's a good place for me to finish. I did weeblie-wobblies to center myself again and they helped. My second DE was more interesting, though, and it made me realize what I've really lost in my time off - the ability to quickly adapt and come up with new strategies. It consistently took two or three touches too many for me to adapt. I lost 14-15. t was a really fun bout, but I totally could have won it if I'd been able to change my approach faster. Good to know.

The real fun of the day, though, was the second part - my first competitive sabre event. I've been fencing with Ray pretty much every week for the last month or two and am having an absolute blast with it. I've really missed fencing Delia, but this is similar in a number of ways - a smart, serious vet training partner. It's a highlight of my week.

Anyway, I fenced Ray first and lost 1-5, but won one of my other bouts and lost one with three points and three with four points. My bladework absolutely bites, but my distance ideas are pretty good. I lost my first DE, but it was a good bout. I was down 2-8 at the break, but came back to lose 13-15. Turns out tht attacking is often a good idea in sabre. Whooda thunk it?

I... am even louder in sabre than I am in foil. I didn't know that that was possible. Pretty much everybody watching spent most of my bouts laughing at me and my... demonstrativeness.

Diane asked if I usually fenced with Delia and then told me that I'm pretty much the spitting image of her as a competitor. And I suddenly realized that she was absolutely right. As the event wore on, I was decreasingly capable of really talking. I barked out my yells and generally talked emphatically to myself. My shoulders curved forwards when I wasn't fencing and I kind of stalked around rather than just walking. It's really weird. It really is Delia.

The thing that really made me think of Delia, though, was the way that my thought processes changed. Everything was very short. I didn't really understand words as well as usual. A guy from my fencing club called between pools and DEs and I answered the phone, but it took him nearly a minute to remind me of who he is... and he's one of my favorite people at the club! When he said his name, I couldn't remember the names of _anybody_ at my club. Really, really weird experience. I could see flashes of various people from the club, but couldn't connect any of them to any names at all.

There have been a lot of interviews with Temple Grandin recently. She's an autistic woman who works with the food industry to create more humane ways to treat animals. In many of these interviews, she describes the way that she thinks and understands the world - as a stream of images rather than a stream of words. Fencing sabre today made me begin to understand her. When I'm fencing foil, I'm pretty wordy. I have a constant stream of words telling me new tactical ideas to try and changes that I need to make. In sabre, though, I was only able to think in pictures. I could see what the last touch had been and could understand, also in pictures, what I needed to try for the next touch. I'll be curious to see if this persists for future sabre tournaments - if this is how I think in sabre -or if I'll gradually become more wordy as I get a few more tournaments under my belt. I'm certainly wordier when fencing sabre in practice.

I've got to say, having fenced foil on and off for nearly two decades now (although with six years of training that I think still has an impact), I know how I compete in foil pretty well. Fencing today was like meeting myself for the first time. A truly odd experience.